Being lied to by parents

What is Truth?

I mean pretty much all parents lie to their children at some point about something and usually it was to protect them or just wasn't something important and it normally doesn't affect the relationship between them and their child. But how does a person reconcile and recover their appreciation for their parents after finding out almost everything they taught them was an evil lie? I don't mean going back to the same relationship as I know that is gone, especially if the parents are still deceived. Just being able to get over resentment for them?

Crazyguy

I was very pissed off to find out ttatt and realize my mother got us into a religion that ruined my childhood. Then after some time I realized that she didn't know any better and was fooled her self. In the end your parents my not of lied by they themselves were deceived.

jhine

WiT , I cannot imagine how you feel ,I can only say my first thought was that if your parents believed and still believe what they told you then they were not lying to you . Not in the sense of deliberately trying to hurt or deceive you , they genuinely feel that they have done right by you .

Parents can only ever do what they think is right at the time , and that , I suppose, it what your parents did . I'm sure they are not bad people , just fallible human beings as we all are.

Jan

Sophthejehovah

Cant imagine how you feel stay strong

stuckinarut2

I also struggle with this thought.

While I know my parents raised me as they genuinely thought was correct -"in the truth", I am really angry that they didnt use their own intelligent brains to figure out TTATT before messing up the next generation!

Yes, I am pissed off about NOT being given a choice!

dubstepped

For me, I just had to realize that things couldn't have been different. They were doing their best and what they thought was right. The intent was good. So, I forgave them. Fogiveness is about letting it go for me, not necessarily for them. At one point pretty much all of us here were doing our best and tried to teach people things that we no longer believe in. That's just where we were back then. None of us were bad people, just mislead people. We were doing our best with good intentions.

It isn't fair to expect our parents to have seen TTAT. They either could or they couldn't, and they couldn't. Lots of people get manipulated into lots of things. They were overmatched and were just different people than us. They grew up in a different era, they have different experiences and perceptions, and they have different cognitive abilities. Just because you or I can see something it doesn't mean that others should be able to. I can see color, but others may be colorblind. They are blind in that way and doing their best. I think our parents were much the same. It doesn't mean that the upbringing doesn't hurt, but just that I don't have to be held in its prison forever by never forgiving them. I accept our differences and limitations. To do otherwise wouldn't be much better than what JW's do.

OneEyedJoe

As others have said, in most cases when parents raise their kids in a cult, they're just doing the best they know how to do. It just happened that they were victims themselves.

The only thing I hold against my father for my cult indoctrination was the way he manipulated me into getting baptized. What he did couldn't be excused even by JW rules since I wasn't driven to do it by love for Jehovah but by his manipulation. I can't imagine that such a baptism would be considered as being enough for forgiveness of sins and entry into paradise.

rebelfighter

What is Truth, you are getting great advise here. The important thing to remember is by forgiving your parents the person who will benefit the most is you. Once you forgive them, then you are free to move forward with your life.

Forgiveness is one of the most powerful things you will ever learn in life, it allows you to put things in the past a lot easier.

cha ching

Lying.... You pretty much have to know "the truth" to lie, right?

I mean, if you did not know that the earth was round, and everyone alive and around you believed and taught you that the earth was flat, and you told your kids the same thing that you had learned and truly thought was real.... is that a lie?

Yes, it is not reality, it is not true.

However, knowing that the earth is round, and then telling the child that the earth is flat, that is definitely a 'lie'.

James Mixon

How do you correct the lie? That's the problem, now when I tell my JW kids

it was all a lie, trust me a big fat lie, they tell me I'm lying just like

my father, Satan. Sometimes it's very difficult to correct a lie.

Being lied to by parents

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