the best AND the worst
Double-life, sounds like a prison sentence....or maybe not?
by sparrowdown 14 Replies latest jw friends
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Powermetal4ever
Living a double life I can honestly say its not the best of both worlds, since I dont find much in the JW world uplifting. I would leave immediately if it wasnt for a few friends and family. So I am having the worst of one world and the average of the other so to speak. Living a double life until you are 67 (as one in this thread) doesnt seem very fun, I am thinking that I must leave somehow before that age. But sometimes I am thinking thats its maybe good to have some insight and inside information in this cult, anyone feel that way?
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DwainBowman
It's real close to hell!
Dwain
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Mum
I lived the "double life" for a very short time. I had an auto accident, a near miss, crying jags, drinking binges and deep depression. I planned an escape and moved to the other end of the country so "they" couldn't harrass me and bring me back into that pit of misery. It took about two years to become mentally free of all the nonsense.
It was SO worth it! I love my life now,.
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sparrowdown
A recurring theme seems to be staying until family wakes up.
What if that never happens, what if this is as good as it gets?
I am the only one to wake up and cannot bring myself to go any more. I'm not disfellowshipped but I know,
they now view me as weak, which makes for some awkward moments when you run into one of them and
they look at you with that mixture of pity and contempt, and try to "encourage" you with the latest news from
the cong, the obligatory "we miss you" even though it's obvious they feel that you have to come back to
meetings before they will actually show it. The ball is your court for them to show their conditional love.
I have to ask myself at times "wouldn't it be easier to just go and pretend, until I know what to do?"
So I appreciate that there are those of you who say it is just not worth it. Thanks.