How did your family react when you made it known that you did not want to be a JW anymore?

by Yondaime 53 Replies latest jw experiences

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  dazed but not confused

  I left and my wife cried once. A year later she joined me in leaving. This will be our second Christmas celebrated ever. Our 2 and 6 year olds love the tree, lights and everything that comes with it.

  My uber dub mom still talks to me. I posted pictures of the kids in front of the Christmas tree on Facebook last week. I hadn’t talked to my mom in about 7-8 weeks and she mentioned seeing the pictures today when I called her. She didn’t say anything negative or bad about it. She just commented on how big the kids were getting. I have always, in the past, blocked her from seeing holiday and birthday pictures. But not this time. I even told her I would buy her a plane ticket to come visit in the spring or summer and she accepted. So for her, I think the shock has warn off and she is a bit more accepting than my sister.

  My sister on the other hand unfriended me on FB a while back and we haven’t spoken for about a year. She’s married to a MS and married into an extremely large JW family.

  My mother-in-law hasn’t treated us any different either.

  My brother stopped attending at 16 and was never baptized. He and I have become much closer since I left.

  Wife and I were both born in and baptized. In for 28 years and now out for over 3. Best decision I ever made.
• 

  Athanasius

  They didn't take it very well and it cost me my marriage. One day I was a respected elder in the congregation, and the next day I was a non-person.

  But that was their problem. So I went back to college, got my degree, got a great job, made new friends, and married a wonderful non-JW woman. Sure there was some pain to endure at first, but it didn't last and the rewards were far greater than anything in the Borg.
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  stuckinarut2

  I'm not at that point yet, but I KNOW it will be a major issue and problem...IF I ALLOW IT TO BE.

  I have determined that I will be calm and dignified, and show by my positivity and happiness that it IS NOT ME with the problem, it is them.
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  talesin

  I was sitting on my mother's bed, and told her I was not going to the meeting (this was after a friend suiciding, and a long illness). She told me I had till the end of the month to get a job and an apartment.

  Ciao!

  ;'(

  tal
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  talesin

  As Bart would say,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, :D
  
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• 

  likeabird

  I never told them. I didn't want them to go through the pain of shunning.

  It didn't make the slightest difference. They totally shun me. They never even contacted me to check if they had a valid reason to shun me.
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  Heaven

  My father stopped giving me the magazines.
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  coalize

  My mother, almost made like in the ancient hebrew times : Almost she tore her tunic, felt on her knees and cried : "I've lost a son"...
• 

  nugget

  It was mixed. My mother needs me to care for her occasionally she didn't want to hear my point of view but still talks to me. She is housebound so doesn't attend meetings and no witnesses other than my sister, cleaner and hairdresser visit. This means that she doesn't get the contextural pressure that the meetings reinforce. She still lives in the past so hasn't kept pace with Jehovah's chariot so she still believes what she believed when she joined.

  My older sister was a class A Bitch. Initially she told me that you couldn't be DF'd for denying that the GB were Gods representatives on Earth. I told her you could and I was. She then said I deserved to be Df'd. Her next move was to visit my mother and remind her of the need to treat me like a dead person. There have been only 2 occasions since when I have seen her and she has looked right through me and refused to acknowledge I was in the room.

  My other sisters are free of the organisation and we get on fine and my Dad never was a JW so he is delighted.

  We hope that our families will be different from the standard JWs but often the power of the group is too strong and they conform. The organisation trains people to think that blood counts for nothing and many are helpless. However non JW family are often more forgiving and accepting than we give them credit for.
• 

  Phizzy

  My experience surprised me, I have a number of JW relatives who I would have thought would have been totally hard line.

  I think, under the influence of my dear old mum, on her last legs now, they were persuaded not to precipitate my getting DF'd, so as long as I did nothing overt that they could not ignore, they were not going to report my thoughts to the B.O.E.

  We had some vigorous discussions in the early days, but the "Patriarch" of the family put a stop to that, telling the others if they talked any more to me about their religion etc, I would destroy their faith, yea well ...

  We have had the distancing of the family, but not direct or profound shunning, and recently they seem to be drawing closer again, perhaps they now realise we ain't never going back ?

  We are simply faded, not DF or DA, so it is easier for our family than others, but I hope many of you on the road to freedom have such an easy passage.