too nice and polite

Phaedra

anyone finding themselves being labeled as "too nice" or "polite" after being a lifelong JW and integrating into the "new world" of realistic beings?

I give up. My JW upbringing killed my realisitc equiping of being in this world.

Godsendconspirator

I've been told that but in a complimentary kind of way.

Hortensia

You'll get over it when you discover you have boundaries and preferences and personal standards just like anyone else.

And when you're old enough and have nothing to lose (welcome to retirement!), you'll give up being polite completely in favor of being real. Doesn't mean I'm a rude old bitch, just that my kindness has limits, eh?

flipper

PHAEDRA- There's nothing wrong with being " too nice " or " polite " - it's just that we need to be aware that there are people out there anywhere in the world including when we were JW's that will take advantage of our kindnesses and use us. The world is full of assholes- I don't think there is such a thing as being " too nice " or " polite " - just need to make sure our kindness isn't given out to assholes who will abuse us and use us. Just my 2 cents

apostrate

When I saw the title of your post I thought you were asking for me personally. Yes, people of "the world" think I am kinda strange, in a too nice and polite way. Back in the days of when I was a Witness, the folks at the Kingdom Hall thought of me as being too "worldly", a weirdo. I don't fit in at either place.

I have to often remind myself that people rarely like people that they don't understand or that they can't control.

stuckinarut2

Yes!

Very true!

compound complex

Greetings, Phaedra:

I've always had my head in the clouds, almost literally. "What are you staring at up there?" curious bystanders would ask.

Well, along with that existed an undue deference toward others. Because my heart and mind were wrapped up in the world of fantasy -- aided and abetted by WT theology and iconography -- it really took me a while to become grounded in the real world, a harsh, no-nonsense world intolerant of my retreats into Wonderland.

Never aggressive, yet I have become mildly assertive when it's necessary to be so. My "no" has, truly, become NO! Gently stated, of course.

I've come a long way, Baby . . .

Et tu?

CoCo

millie210

I've always had my head in the clouds, almost literally. "What are you staring at up there?" curious bystanders would ask.

Well, along with that existed an undue deference toward others. Because my heart and mind were wrapped up in the world of fantasy -- aided and abetted by WT theology and iconography -- it really took me a while to become grounded in the real world, a harsh, no-nonsense world intolerant of my retreats into Wonderland.

Never aggressive, yet I have become mildly assertive when it's necessary to be so. My "no" has, truly, become NO! Gently stated, of course.

I've come a long way, Baby . . .

Et tu?

CoCo, You are such a compelling poster and I love your take on this. So beautifully put!

compound complex

Dearest Millie210:

May peace and love reign supreme for you and yours today and for all your tomorrows . . .

CoCo

Phizzy

I don't think you need to be impolite in this world, or lower whatever standards you have acquired just because they are higher than the norm.

What is a danger though, with the JW indoctrination and training, is that we were taught never to challenge anything, and never to have our own opinion and ideas, and stick up for them.

The realisation that we are free to do so is a wonderful thing, but we can do that in a polite, empathetic, non-aggressive way.

too nice and polite

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