About me...

NoLongerAjw

Wow, thank you all so much for the welcome..
I will tell you a little about myself and my past.. as much as i can for now anyway.. One of the most scarey parts of joining a group is i am afraid to put my name on here.. will that mean i will get a visit from the elders if I do? i think they put the fear in me :)..
Anyway When i was 6 my father commited suicide.. it's a long story .. nothing to do with JW's he was just really derpressed.. After that my mom was devistated.. went searching for something to make her happy. came accross the witnesses.. and started studing.. this was in 1985 .. she was baptized in 1986.. i taged along to every meeting with her.. And was looked down upon by many elders wives who had children my age. Mainly cause My mom let me continue Dance class.. and i was still in public school.. as time went by, my mom got remarried to a man in the KH .. around 1986 as well.. they had my sister in 1987. Things got stricter as the years went by.. had to stop dance class.. my mom taught us homeschooling at home.. by pressure of elders.. mind you this was my freashmen year.. so i was not to happy.. lost all my friends, besides JW's.. story goes on and on... I met a guy where i worked at 19.. snuck around with him for awhile.. and finally stood up to my mom said i am getting married and thats that.. elders talked non stop .. about how bad i was.. and so on.. got kicked out of the house.. cause my step dad a MS would be frowned upon letting me stay and have to step down.. He was a nice Man and could tell it wasnt he decision for me to go .. i got married a month later.. noone came to the wedding on my side except my grandma and uncle.. we got married outside by a judge .. hoping my mom and dad would attend that way.. "No church" i continued to go the mettings.. only thing that happend was i was not supposed to answer for awhile.. i HATED going but went cause of my mom.. My step dad died.. in 1998 of a heart attack.. again my mom needed something.. couldnt find it in the truth. she went back to her old self.. and met a nice guy out of the truth whom she is married to now... and is happiest i have seen her seen my real dad died.. she stoped going to meetings.. which gave me an out as well.. since i went for her.. So i was free.. lost my friends there but dont relly care to much.. my best fried there is 24 now her dad is PO and she is still not allowed to date.. not old enough yet!!!! neither my mom nor i have been to a meeing in a year or two.. i am glad my sister has now got to go to a normal public school at 13 and has a normal life.. but i am sad i missed so much during my childhood.. elders came by here once and moms once to see what was wrong.. but have not bothered to come by anymore. i thought it was there job to gather the lost sheep.. oh well.. i am now happily married to a wonderful guy.. i am almost 25 and so is he.. we have a 2 year old boy and a 3 month old girl... and my mom is happy now too.. we have no relitives in the truth.. so life is good for now.. we were never disfelloweshiped or disaccociated or anything.. dont now why though guess they dont care..
it wil be nice to get to know you all better.. and one day i wont be scared and maybe be able to post my name and email.. that my be a long time form now though..
take care...

Thirdson

Nolonger,

Thanks for sharing your story. Welcome to the board we are glad you are here.

It is the relating of stories like this and sharing cmments that helps others as well as giving each of us the chance to vent.

There is no need to say your real name here and to some extent it is a protection. Some of the posters know who I am and I guess other readers who know/knew me could figure out who I am but I post by this handle on this and a couple of other boards to keep a common identity.

Thirdson

'To avoid criticism, say nothing, do nothing, be nothing'

alias

Dear NoLongerAjw,
Welcome! No need to fear your anonominity here, and don't feel that you need to share anything too personal or that you are uncomfortable with.

I enjoyed reading your story, as it reminded me partly of my own life growing up. Especially the part about dating a "non-jw" in your teens and having to sneak around to see him. I had a similiar experience when I was 17, but ended up having to 'let go' of him because it just wasn't working out with me having to hide the relationship (and inconveniencing him in the meanwhile). A lost love that I have grieved many times over.

On the other hand, it sounds like your life is better off now. You are not too much younger than me at this point, and I too am catching up on lost time. Somedays I wish it was possible to go re-live all of those years and do the normal things that were forbidden. As it stands now I am inactive and doing my best to stay "faded" because of family in the org. The elders/cong don't bother getting in touch - although I do expect a visit soon for a memorial invite.

Again, welcome!

Alia

mommy

Thank you for sharing with us. Like the others here I will add not to feel bad about not telling us your name. That is the great thing about the net, we get to tell all and share all of ourselves, and still can remain annonymous. There is a certain cleaansing that our mind and heart goes through, just getting it out.
So welcome!an I can't wait to hear more from you.
wendy(my real name)

crittersitter

welcome

Edited by - crittersitter on 25 February 2001 20:7:40

RR

Welcome "NLAJW" pull up a chair and make yourself comfy!

_______________
People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

thinkers wife

Thanks for sharing No Longer. Funny thing Alia, I was just talking to my husband about wondering what my life would be like if I had been able to do the normal things. He brought up a good point. We would have never met. Plus I don't regret learning the things I did. Could have never learned them any other way.
Great to hear people having good lives despite the Borg!!
TW

Latte

Hello NoLongerAjw,

Welcome!

Yes, it's good to exchange experiences - thanks for sharing yours!

MOMMY

That's a very good way of describing the internet, in relation to ex-JW's. Yes, it's certainly has been a kinda 'cleansing' - being able to 'offload' so to speak, it has been wonderful to do so here. Thanks everyone for listening to me.

Latte
(nearly put my REAL name then, this ANNOMINITY (spelling??) stuff is FUN

JT

thanks for sharing your story- as we read your post we continue to see the same common thread- one of lost childhood due to some rules made up by a group of guys up in NY who have not paid a phone bill, gas bill or bought a water heater for the house in 20-50- yrs

since i have been here there is one poster who refers to such post as yours as Cry babies or whinning- but i wonder about this guys claim of being part of the WT-

thanks again

and welcome to True freedom

James

JT

mommy says:

There is a certain cleaansing that our mind and heart goes through, just getting it out.
********

better words could not have been written in describing the effect of getting yrs of guilt and pain off ones chest

the net provides that bond between folks who for yrs thought that SOMETHING WAS WRONG WITH THEM - when in fact we all were "Bamboolzed and Hoodwinked"

just my 2

JT

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