(in addition to the pedophelia, of course)
these comments are all based on the sum of my and others experiences as one of jehovah's wtnesses:
1)
they didn't allow me to go to high school. not one day. this system of things was going to end soon anyway! besides, my two little brothers (ages 3 and 5) needed a baby-sitter, so wasn't i convenient? there was a bus stop right on the corner by my house, so every morning all the kids would walk right by and wait for the bus. i would see them laughing and teasing each other, the sun gleaming on their hair and it felt like shit. i was expected to keep the house immaculate, the children well cared for, and study my watchtower and nwt when i wasn't busy. in this way, i would become a good wife for a brother someday. i could not retreat even to fantasy, because i was told jehovah god could read my thoughts and he would punish me for thinking bad thoughts, or masturbating, or listening to rock music. my mind was a tabula rasa, except for jehovah's word.
2) my only solace was my girlfriend in the kingdom hall, a very pretty blonde girl. she lived with her mother and older sister, who were really mean to her. she was very cool and we got to be really good friends. she would come home from school and tell me all about high school and how neat it was, and about all the pretty worldy boys who went there. she got involved with a senior boy who drove a volkswagen. he belonged to a club whose mission it was to deflower as many girls as he could, and he got to her. she told me all about it one night when i was sleeping over, that she had been dating this worldy boy and having sex with him and she was in love with him. she asked me not to tell, and i didn't. the next day we were standing on the sidewalk and he drove up and she got in the car. he tried to get me to come in too, just to go for a ride with them, but i was afraid. afraid to think on my own. afraid to breathe. this is how the wts makes you. afraid to live afraid to do anything but what they tell you to do. anyway she told me that night that he wanted me because i was a virgin. i went home right after that and my older sister grabbed me and said who was that boy you and ---- were talking to earlier? i said no one just a boy. she said don't lie jehovah can tell if you're lying and i said a boy at school. a WORLDLY BOY?! she shrieked and i said yes and she asked what he wanted, screaming and yelling and saying over and over if i didn't tell her i would be as guilty as my friend and i would die at armageddon and blah blah blah and being a mouse i betrayed my best friend. my sister got right on the phone and called
----'s mother. i sneaked out of the house the next morning, and i had never done anything like that in my life. but i wasn't allowed to talk to my girlfriend on the phone, and i had to know what happened. she answered the door, her beautiful face swollen and bruised, her body bruised and her eye black from the vicious beating her mother gave her. she was going away to live with her worldy aunt, and was being cast out of the organization and immediate family for bringing shame upon them. i told her how sorry i was and cried and she said just go away. i wept all the way home, and have since then never betrayed anyone's confidence ever again. i began to hate the wts on that day, and could barely stomach the sight of
----'s mother, singing songs and acting all pious and stuff.
3) they fill you with phobias, with their stories of demons and mass destruction and render you incapable of independent thought or growth of any kind. they make you afraid to buy anything used, because it might be demonized. they make you utterly self-conscious. they make you feel guilty for being human.
but i grew up. and i grew a spine. and i got out. and i found my friend again, who also got out. she gave me a whole bunch of anais nin books, and 'the sensuos woman', 'our bodies, ourselves', etc. and showed me that there was no shame in loving yourself, in pleasuring yourself, and she taught me how to embrace life and not be afraid. and she forgave me, 'cause she knew i was a 14-year-old brainwashed kid. we earned our GED's together, then she got married and moved away, and i went to college. and no i didn't marry a nice jw boy, thank god.
f#$% the wts for all their evil
sig,
a true non-believer
(edited to correct html formatting)