What are my dreams telling me?

by Billygoat 11 Replies latest jw friends

  • Billygoat
    Billygoat

    Some of you have heard of my issues at work with some of the characters I work with. It's got me pretty stressed out. We had a little "meeting" last week where he wanted to talk to me. One thing led to another and it led into a pretty heated discussion about our dislikes for each other. We walked away without slinging punches, but I'm beginning to question if this is repairable. Anyways, one of the things I confronted him with was his temper. I can't even begin to tell you how many times I've witnessed him throwing temper tantrums in our office. He'll get off the phone and slam and throw things around. I hear him say things like "You mother-f*****! Mother-f*****! Mother-f*****!" on a regular basis. He swears strings of vulgar words that would make a sailor blush. I told him that type of behavior was unacceptable to me and that is would have to stop. That if it didn't I would make sure through other avenues it would. Well, it has stopped. Granted it's only been a week, but he's been very polite and friendly. But now I'm having nightmares about him. Since that discussion I've had four dreams.

    1. We get into an arguement at the office. We're in my cubicle (which is pretty big) and his veins are popping out in his head. He's jabbing his finger into my chest and when I grab it and push it away, he comes after me. He isn't completely choking me, since I can scream out. But the other 8 people in the office can't hear me. I can hear them talking and laughing but they don't come to my help. I wake up.

    2. I'm lying in my bed, in the middle of the night and I'm awakened by the sound of someone whistling. (R whistles a lot in the office.) The whistler is right below my window whistling "Aloha Oe" a traditional Hawaiian farewell song. I look out the blinds and R is right below my window walking away. I go out onto my front steps and his car drives by with some loud music basing out of it. That's the end.

    3. The same dream as number two, but when I go out on my front steps he has turned his car lights towards my car and is slashing my tires. He sees me and starts walking towards me. I wake up.

    4. Last night's dream: R and I are travelling together on a business trip. We are in an airport bathroom brushing our teeth. He says he's out of toothpaste, can he borrow mine? Sure. I offer it to him and he brushes his teeth. He finishes up and clasps my shoulder and says thanks. I'm not done yet, so he goes ahead to the gate. When I arrive at the gate, R has convince the pilot to leave early. I'm stranded in Arkansas overnight. Upset, I begin crying and I wake up.

    I don't necessarily believe in dream interpretation like back in Daniel or Joseph's day, but I do believe dreams are an indication of our sub-concious. I'm not sure what to think about this. Do any of you have an ideas?

    Thanks,

    Andi

  • NoMoreJW
    NoMoreJW

    Hi, youre talking about oneof my pet subjects - dreams :)

    As you say, dreams can be an indication of your subconscious, but if any meaning is to be found, you are the one to find it. Although it is apparent that R is having an overbearing and bullying effect on you, it also seems you have the strength to face him alone. Dreams are so personal, yet recurring themes, objects, events etc can have similar meanings from one person to the next. May I suggest you not take too close a view of them and concentrate more on your conscious feelings?

    I experienced such an employer in my last job and stood up to him and his cronies. It was tough but I just didn`t allow them to see they were having any effect on me. Eventually I got what I wanted - an end to my contract! I was offered an honourable way out, I think only because they felt they couldn`t beat me into their ways. I heard some time later that he had been moved to head office where his activities could be monitored. I, on the other hand, went on to live out my dreams (sorry for the pun!) and am enjoying my life much more than those I left behind.

    Good luck and continue to face the bully!

    Mike.

  • HomebutHiding
    HomebutHiding

    The latest take on why we dream is this: We are consolidating memories. Neural activity happens while we sleep, and perceptions occur as they would when awake, the difference being that the pre-frontal cortex, which normally limits us to ways of reason, is disabled during REM sleep (the stage in which we dream). In essence, it is not there to tell us "Hey! You can't do that!", or, "That cannot happen in reality." So, our dreams can take on bizarre aspects. They will likely reflect recent thoughts and happenings, as the brain tries to consolidate these into long-term memory. HbH

  • MrMoe
    MrMoe

    Andi -- I can interpret dreams... I will work on this as soon as I can and e-mail you with my research.

    Amanda

  • LB
    LB

    Andi I'm a simple guy and so I won't have any deep thoughts to share with you. But honestly it sounds to me like you'd just love to have this guy out of your life, regardless of the repair work done at work. Maybe your dreams are just manifestations of your desire to be rid of him yet he's just always there. Can't get rid of him.

    it's a nightmare!!!

  • LittleToe
    LittleToe

    Seems to me, if we throw a little role reversal into the pot, that you'd like to slash his tyres, poke him, throttle him, cover him in toothpaste and strand him in Arkansas.

    Any chance you can pay someone to do any of the above?

    Only kidding, but you've obviously got deep issues with this guy that are affecting you on a sub-conscious level as well as the conscious. He is disturbing your harmony and peace, and sounds like a generally unsavoury character.

    From here, it seems unlikely that you will kiss and make up. I suspect that one of you will move before the end of the year. The alternative may be that it will affect your health. Not forgetting that you already have the added stress of wedding plans.

    You're in my prayers, sis.

  • DazedAndConfused
    DazedAndConfused

    From what I am reading, my gut reaction is that you are feeling a loss of power. I think you are losing your sense of self due to this persons overbearing ways. <P></P>1. 
    they don't come to my help
    To me this indicates that his behavior is causing you to feel insecure in all aspects of your life. Not only do you feel that he is sucking you dry, so to speak, it seems that you feel that others see this but do not do anything to help. <P></P>2.
    whistling "Aloha Oe" a traditional Hawaiian farewell song
    I think this is indicating that you realize that by his behavior you are losing yourself or self confidence. <P></P>3. This one has a 3-point thought: <P></P>a)
    turned his car lights towards my car
    I feel that the fact he points his lights toward what he is doing indicates that you feel he realizes what he is doing to you. <P></P>b)
    and is slashing my tires
    ;I see this as you feeling that what he is doing to you as being a deliberate attack upon you because he knows he can get to you. <P></P>c)
    He sees me and starts walking towards me
    ;This goes along with my last thoughthe realizes what he is doing to youbut in this aspect of the dream you are showing that you feel that you are being confronted with his actions by design (that he is doing this to definitely intimidate you). <P></P>4. This is two-fold: <P></P>a)
    R has convince the pilot to leave early. I'm stranded in Arkansas overnight
    ;Again, loss of self or power. <P></P>b)
    Upset, I begin crying and I wake up
    ;As your dreams are progressing, I see that you are feeling more desperate due to this inconsiderate fools actions. <P></P>While I can see a natural progression in your dreams I cannot for a certainty tell you how to deal with this. What I would suggest is to find out why. Why does he do this? Is it because he is in general an ass or is it because you are better at your job than he is and you intimidate him, therefore causing his own insecurities to bully you?

    Edited by - DazedAndConfused on 27 June 2002 15:50:45

  • DazedAndConfused
    DazedAndConfused

    Sorry about the last post. I don't know how to fix the scrolling on it.

  • Valis
    Valis

    Billygoat....methinks you need to do something to get your mind of of this cretinous person you have to deal with. Maybe get another job, which I know sucks, but one good way to be rid of all this if its hurting your mental state. Or find something to take your mind off of it like get the mozz to kick his ass good and plenty. BTW, I guess I stoopid today..what kind of work do you do again?

    Dazed, go back into edit post and make sure the Automatic Cf/Lf box is checked near the Reply To Topic button. Either that or find your longest sentences and make them shorter by inserting the cursor and pressing enter...should make them fit in the text box.

    Sincerely,

    District Overbeer

  • Billygoat
    Billygoat

    So many cool thoughts! Thanks everyone! Keep the thoughts coming!

    Here is a bit of background on some of these things that might help you understand where I think some of the thoughts came from.

    veins are popping out in his head

    jabbing his finger into my chest

    he comes after me

    choking me

    slashing my tires

    R is a bully. He's a very aggressive sales rep. To the point where is dishonest and totally capable of lying in order to obtain a sale. Very "used car salesmen" approach. I've had clients tell me they were relieved when I took over his last job, because they wouldn't have to deal with him as much. They always felt cornered by him. He knows he does it, since his belief is "that's how you make money". His bullishness is very evident in all of my dreams. He knows he pushes my buttons. I try not to let him, but sometimes it just gets to me. He knows it because once I heard him laughing on the phone with someone (?) about how it was hilarious that he made me cry one time. I've overheard several of his conversations with people when he doesn't think I'm at my desk. Being a quiet typist is helpful sometimes.

    The whistler is right below my window whistling "Aloha Oe" a traditional Hawaiian farewell song.

    His wife is from Hawaii and is my age. In our friendly conversations Russell and I have reminisced about some of the local Hawaiian hangouts and where to get the best Bento Box or our favorite noodle house. (Not many of those conversations!) But I think the song is significant because here in Texas it's not a song many people identify with or even know. Perhaps my dream was telling me he was trying to single me out?

    He finishes up and clasps my shoulder and says thanks. I'm not done yet, so he goes ahead to the gate. When I arrive at the gate, R has convince the pilot to leave early.

    I look at this as my fear of his backstabbing tendencies. Be nice to someone when you need something, but when you're done, get out of town and stab 'em in the back.

    I'm stranded in Arkansas overnight.

    We were supposed to visit Wal-Mart yesterday in Bentonville, but I bowed out of the trip due to a headache.

    I can hear them talking and laughing but they don't come to my help.

    I've been talking to management about this situation for almost 9 months now. They keep telling me they're "working on it" but sometimes I wonder. I've been told because we work for a union, EVERYTHING must be documented very carefully. So lately I've wondered if they're even listening to me.

    Anyway, my laptop is being sent to headquarters today. They're doing a full investigation on the security breach I told you about last week. They're taking me very seriously once it's "their information" that's been tampered with. *sigh* Either way, I have a peace knowing that something is being done. Perhaps this is what's necessary for them to take me seriously?

    I'm leaving on vacation July 4th for two weeks. Two weeks of reprieve from this nut. Woohoo!

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