by Lady Lee 31 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
Trotafox
Codependents anonymous addresses some of these issues. They use group therapy and the twelve step system. The cost is very minimal. In my area, they were having meetings once a week. Can you can handle meetings? I could only take a few. Anyways, look up CODA on the net or in your phone book.
SS
..............i hope lawyers suing the watchtower bible and tract society consult with you.......... they could use your knowledge of that subject.
Thanks, Saint: Have heard of Codependency but was not sure what it was. I'm so independent I never thought I would be considered a codependent. Will check it out.
Lady: What web site?
Trot
This book is a real tour de force. You will enjoy it, and learn from it, even if you think you DON'T need to read it. Trust me, you do.
Trot Just click on the globe under my name - it will take you to my website.
LDH Thanks for the link.
Many of the issues dealt with in CODA programs are very similar and it isn't difficult to reframe the issues in terms of an abusive organization.
Lady: Thanks, Lady. Visited the site. Will revisit as time pemits.
Trot
Based on a discussion last night I am bringing this back to the top
The new discussion is at Emotional Blackmail and ex-JWs
You sure do keep that hammer pounding away Lee
Good thing about that pounding is that you consistently "hit the nail on the head".
Good post
sincerely
Special K
Great thread LL. Thanks for using your resurrection powers.
Oftentimes we understand a situation better by looking at it from a different angle, or by using an analogy to better explain. Your comparison of the relationship Jehovah?s Witnesses have with their members to that of an abusive husband and wife is spot on.
Jehovah is not the problem here. The problem is how a group of men determine who will be saved and who won't and the rules to determine that.
Exactly. I think back to my own situation in leaving, and it wasn?t that God told me I was wrong, or evil or that he would kill me, it was the Witnesses who told me that. THEY were setting themselves up as judge, jury and executioner.
Demand: ?You?ve got to get back to meetings.? I heard that from 9 elders, 3 circuit overseers and one district overseer. Ad nauseum. Nothing was more important to them, and they didn?t give a damn how I felt.
Pressure: Just the relentless repetition over the course of 3 years put a lot of pressure on me. It finally reached a point where I would not allow any of them into my home. They just wouldn?t shut up and leave me alone.
Threats: This is one that really hits home. ?You?ve got to get back to meetings.? I would ask, ?Why?? In the beginning that usually was enough to send them scurrying on their way. Then they wised up and started to respond with the passive/aggressive threat: ?You don?t want to die in Armageddon do you??
So let me get this straight. Jehovah doesn?t care how I feel, what?s going on in my mind or my heart, all he really wants is my butt parked in a seat 3 times a week. What if I had suffered an accident and was paralyzed from the neck down and couldn?t leave my house, or even worse, what if I was dying and was hospitalized? I wouldn?t be able to make the meetings then.
They would usually whip out their pre-programmed response of ?Jehovah reads hearts and all we have to do is our best, yadda yadda? So I would respond with, ?So Jehovah only cares about what shows on the outside and that people can see. He doesn?t care if someone is in intense pain on the inside, where people cannot see. So for physical problems, you get a free pass, but for emotional problems you?re SOL.?
That would usually get them angry. God, this brings back memories of all those fights. If I?d only realized sooner that I didn?t have to do that, I could have saved myself 3 years of arguments, stress and anxiety with a bunch of toffee-headed, malodorous, lying, hypocritical bigots.
Yup BT that's the thing. People are so programmed to believe they have to listen to the elders, be nice to them, let them in their homes.
And they have just as hard a time breaking away from it as an abused spouse
