How Common is this amongst JW's?

by stevieb1 32 Replies latest jw experiences

  • stevieb1
    stevieb1

    I found this material on a pro-JW newsletter, and I've had this personal experience myself and know many others who have also. Before I became a JW I experienced a tremendous amount of "love" from the congregation I associated with, but once baptized they leave and move on to the next potential convert. As a single person, I was never invited out to gatherings very much and always felt a little left out in the very clique-ish congregation that I attended.

    I no longer identify myself as a JW due to all the holes in their theology, but what hurts the most is the lack of love shown in my local congregation. They never even saw me "drifting away" and it was only when I expressed doubts about certain teachings of the WTS that the elders became interested! I'm sure my experience is common amongst many.

    Enjoy the account below - it is s true. BTW I am not the author

    Have You Been Ignored Lately?

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Picture the scene, your looking out of your window at home, you see the brothers and sisters witnessing up your street, they get closer and closer, they are next door now, you think any moment the brothers will call at your house to be courteous and say a quick hello as they go by. Maybe your feeling a bit down and could do with the company. You think 'I'll offer them a coffee and a biscuit/cookie when they call'.........but to your dismay, the group of brothers and sisters walk right past your house to the one on the other side of you!!!

    How sad!! You begin to think maybe you have leprosy or something because they didn't call to say hello. On the other hand, the ones out witnessing know you live there but think 'oh we don't need to go to that house because a brother/sister lives there', but why not? We are quick to go look for sheep-like ones in the territory, but sometimes ignore those sheep that already belong to Jehovah's organization. Wouldn't it be the right thing to do to look after the ones who already love Jehovah?

    We may not want to stop for a coffee, but there's no harm in a 5 minute 'hello, how are you my brother/sister, we were just calling in your area and thought we would say a quick hello". How would you feel if someone called and said that? I know i would feel loved and wanted in the congregation, on the other hand, if they walked past my home, which sad to say has happened in the past, I would feel quite dejected. While our brothers may not intentionally set out to upset others in their homes as they are passing by,.

    Just give a thought next time you (or I ) are witnessing and we walk past a brother or sisters home. The angels maybe just trying to direct you to a fellow member of the truth just to give them a bit of encouragement by just saying hello to them. It doesn't take much of our time. Its free to do that, and better still, it may just be enough to strengthen that brother or sister to endure another day in this wicked world. All because you showed them an act of kindness by saying 'hello' to them as you witnessed in their street or apartment block that day!!

  • minimus
    minimus

    Most persons on this board would be thrilled to have the JW's walk right by their door.

  • Kjell Hedblom
    Kjell Hedblom

    STEVIEB1!!

    I am from Sweden and I can tell u that this is very common in my Country and ofcource everywhere. I have been in 6 different congregations during my 44 years in JW from the North of Sweden to the South.It is very easy to be left out,like the way u experienced.Many are those that been through that.

    It is sad to admit that it is often that it needs that one already done something "bad" to get the attention from the Elders when they are Blind and dont rush to help when one start drifting away. Ofcource not every Elder are like this,there is alot of good ones out there but its always like a lottery.If u are lucky then you are in a good C. but if not u easily get punished instead of getting help in time from

    Elders that have real love to the flock.

    About been Ignored:Yep that have happend to me and my Family many times just as the example said. It did happend especially after I did step down as an Elder 1990.

    Now I am out since 1 month back so I dont care anymore.My wife is still in but she havnt heard one word from anyone since 30 May ( she have not been to any meetings since my D.F.) but ofcource nobody cares of her needs. Many JW they dont have real love in their hearts,its just a mask on the outside.

    Take care my friend

    Hugs from Kjell Hedblom

  • AjaxMan
    AjaxMan

    Many JW they dont have real love in their hearts,its just a mask on the outside.

    My thoughts precisely. I was never a JW and in getting involved with one I did notice that attitude once I started expressing my views opposing the WTS. They sure do give a great acting when showing how lovely, nice and concerned they are, but if you're not interested or if you disagree with their views, their masks will certainly come off.

    Regards,

    Ajax (A WTS opposer and friggin' proud of it)

    Edited by - AjaxMan on 6 July 2002 19:13:26

  • Kjell Hedblom
    Kjell Hedblom

    AJAX MAN!!

    I just say AMEN to your comments!

    Kjell H.

  • Windchaser
    Windchaser

    Hi stevie, to have to be REMINDED to visit "friends" when you are in their neighborhood has got to be one of the stupidest things I can think of at the moment. Where is the love?

    I was a single parent for a lot of the 30 years that I was a jw and I was mostly ignored. I got the token invites to the get-togethers and I will be generous and say I had one or two friends in each of the khs I attended over the years. (One of these "close" friends, incidently, ripped me off a few hundred dollars.) I was very lonely and depressed. All I can say is, that is one sick religion and I am happy that they shun me now.

    Hi Kjell, my grandparents came from the Old Country and I am half Swedish. My mom married my dad, a Panamanian, but divorced him when I was little. We moved in with my grandparents in Massachusetts. My older sister remembered our lives in Panama and how warm and wonderful the family was there, always hugging and holding one another. I never saw my Swedish grandparents touch. I think it might be the custom to not show affection. But, it is true, the world-wide love of jws is shallow, at best.

    Edited by - windchaser on 6 July 2002 19:32:56

  • bad_associashun
    bad_associashun

    stevieb- thanks for posting that piece, it's as windchaser says, how sad people who so strongly profess having 'the love' have to reminded to show it.

    ajaxman- another amen- good post- question their doctrines & watch them hit the eject button

  • Gopher
    Gopher

    If you're not in the right clique or group of people, it is very easy to "fall through the holes" and not be noticed.

    This is especially true in larger congregations, in the cities, where there are more people to account for inside the congregation, and where life is busier.

    But if you have a popular last name, or money, then you'll never be lonesome.

    Gopher

  • FriendlyFellaAL
    FriendlyFellaAL

    If you're not in the right clique or group of people, it is very easy to "fall through the holes" and not be noticed.

    This is especially true in larger congregations, in the cities, where there are more people to account for inside the congregation, and where life is busier.

    But if you have a popular last name, or money, then you'll never be lonesome.

    Unfortunately, I've also found this to be the case. My mother was basically a single parent in the eyes of the congregation as my father was an unbeliever. You would think that extra assistance would be offered, but for the most part we were shunned by the congregation. It's sad to think about the number of times we would all meet at the Hall for service on a Saturday morning only to have no one else assigned to go out with us. We'd usually put in a few minutes, grab a return visit or two and then head on back to the house.

    Brian

  • Kjell Hedblom
    Kjell Hedblom

    WINDCHASER!!

    Nice to read your post! You are fare away from Sweden but through Internet we got really close.Isnt that nice.

    Many Hugs from

    Kjell Hedblom with Family!

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