Hello Cap, I have 3 kids, ages 15, 9, and 7. The oldest 2 are so glad to be out of the JW's they don't care alot about deep spiritual things as much as my youngest. Sure they do ask questions . but they seem to be taking it more in stride than the youngest.
My 7 yr old son, has always been a little old man in a kids body, I guess because he has been thru so much since before he was born. He was a 2 month too early 2lb premmie , we didnt know if he would live, and the first 3 yrs he was at the hospital all the time. He later developed behavoir problems that they said were OCD and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. But he is doing alot better the older he gets.
Just said that to give you a little history of why this child is so interested in spiritual things, Iguess because he has faced death and wants to know where he would go if he died. He was always taught a paradies earth and resurrection up until a year ago.
Now he still talks about his fear of armeggedon, which is totally unhealthy and mind blowing for a 7 yr old to go into great detail of how Jehovah will do it all. He has nightmares all the time. He is in constant fear of dying, of me dying, he has very vidid dreams of me dying quiet often. I have to reasure him that it was just a dream. But he is too smart to just let that go. He knows things happen , he watches the news, maybe all the 9/11 tragedy is also affecting him.
He begs me to tell him the truth about where we go when we die, like I know something and am just not telling him. I honestly don't know what to tell him sometimes, because I dont know those answers.
But as we left the borg, we just took it very slowly with the kids, the oldest the 15 yr old son, knew if was all bullcrap since a couple of years before that. We didnt have a clue about how he really felt , he seemed to going right along and doing well with being a JW. Now he is just happy and open minded about things. My daughter is just glad to not sit at meetings anymore. She can only remember the horror of long assemblies and conventions. LOL I agree
When my 7 yr old ask me about armeggedon, paradise, heaven etc. I just telll him that Jesus promised that he would take care of us. Then we talk about how good Jesus was to people and how much he loved his friends and how much he still loves us. I tell him honestly I don't know if we will live on the earth forever , or go to heaven. But I switch it quick to how happy we will be which ever place we go. I tell him not to worry he will be with all his loved ones when the time comes. He says he will just kill himself if I die, and lay in my coffin with me until I wake up. I hope that is not too strong of a statement and I hope it doesnt put anyone off, but this is the mind of my 7 yr old.
I told him not to worry, that I would be fine, I would be with Jesus in heaven maybe even looking down on him and laughing at all the crazy things he is doing, and that I would always be in his heart. It seems to help a bit, but he is not quiet sure if he beleives this, as I am not quiet sure I do either.
His fear of armeggedon, I handle the same way, Jesus will protect those who he loves, don't worry about it we will all be safe. He worries about his little friend who is not a witness being destoried, I told him God will do the right thing. I myself do not beleive in armeggedon for sure, and if it did happen it will not be the way jw think it will.
I just have to answers his questions as they come and not add too much to it. I try to focus on turning around to make it comforting to him, because he suffers great anxiety about everything anyway. In time I am sure he will come to learn things on his own, and decide for himself as he gets older. But while he is little I try to help him along by wiping away all the terror we learned as JW, which is not easy. He does seem to be doing better lately on this , I just try and remember what a shock and lifestyle change it was for me to leave the borg, and he is just 7 , but old enough to be fully indoctrinated in the JW teachings. Now we talk alot about what if it happens this way or that way and we even laugh. I sure understand how you feel Cap , it is hard to not know what to tell your kids, but in the long run being as honest as you can , being appropriate in what you say because of each childs age and indiviuality, that will be something they can learn from. That it is ok not to have all the answers and that way they can grow up with freedom to choose.
