"Keeping up with Jehovah's Chariot" (page 3)

Muddy Waters

The anointed get taken up to heaven just before Armageddon..?? Well isn't that just wonderful for them. And all the rest of Jehovah's sheep - the lowly second-class rank and file - get to go through this horrifying ordeal of fireballs from the sky & maddened hordes of people trying to kill them and each other, while earthquakes tear the ground apart and bodies rot and flash floods & tsunamis are all about. But I'm sure they will be very happy to know that the anointed are all okay. Whew.

What happened to all the people knowing that "a prophet had been in their midst" if all the "prophets" are not there - they've been "raptured"?? I guess that's where the lowly rank and file get to tell everybody that their prophets are now invisible, just like Jesus... And all the worldly people will be like, "oh, okay" as they get destroyed in the most terrible & terrifying ways. But this is all lovingly necessary of course. And then all the faithful JWs get to clean up the mess & the bodies (with the help of millions of birds) and somehow the anointed will still direct them from heaven.

Its such a case of the GB saying, "Heck with you guys! We're outta here! Aren't you happy for us? But don't worry about a thing, we're still going to be your leaders forever & ever! Or at least for the next 1,000 years. And we will be absolutely perfect and immortal and all safe and cozy in heaven while you guys get to schlep around cleaning up the earth and go through another horrific test from Satan..."

aintenoughwiskey

Solomon will likely be resurrected. If you want to see a Dub squirm tell them some of the bible was written by apostates. Then mention Salomon's apostasy. My relative tried to justify it saying he was deceived by his wives. Weave that into a watchtower comment, and watch the heads explode.

FusionTheism

I totally forgot to include the New Light from 2012:

* The Toes on the Statue in Daniel now represent America and Britain since 1914, NOT the previous view that they were the political powers that weren't united in the Last Days.

Vidiot

punkofnice - "All I can say is, the chariot doesn't really move anywhere interesting. In fact, it hardly moves at all..."

The wheels are sure spinning like mad, though.

Brokeback Watchtower

You know the way Jehovah's Chariot is moving these days or say from 1914 till present, going all zigzag, up and down, sideways, 180 degree u turns, sporadic stops and starts it seems almost like nobody's steering the dam thing, Keeping up with Jehovah's Chariot has become quite a challenge it's become like a cat and mouse game where Jehovah's Chariot is the mouse and people trying keep up with are the cat trying to pounce on it for a nice meal.

Brokeback Watchtower

Here is a 5 second clip of the motion of Jehovah's Chariot now you must take it that a lot of these zigs and zags are many miles in length and dizzying to the eye:

punkofnice

whiskey - My relative tried to justify it saying he was deceived by his wives. Weave that into a watchtower comment, and watch the heads explode.

Apostate is as apostate does. He either was an apostate or he wasn't....no matter what led the idiot solomon where he went.

OMG...new light(tm) solomon was stumbled!

freemindfade

Hard to keep up with a chariot doing doughnuts.

DesirousOfChange

Image result for chariot with broken wheel

KEEPING UP WITH JEHOVAH'S CHARIOT

Doc

bafh

w05 5/1 p. 22 par. 18 The Resurrection Hope—What Does It Mean for You?
We realize that should we die before Armageddon, a continued course of conduct displeasing to Jehovah could put us in the same position as those who have no prospect of a resurrection.

Uh, what happened to " the wages sin pays is death" and the resurrection of the "righteous and unrighteous"?
How do people not see these blatantly unscriptural comments and is anyone on the GB or writing department really doing a quality control check before this shit gets printed?

"Keeping up with Jehovah's Chariot"

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