I was one of those elders daughters and I got it worse then probably anyone else. If I did anything to cause embarrasment to my father I was beat with a leather strap to his boots to his fist. Thank you for asking.
ELDER'S WIVES AND CHILDREN
by minimus 23 Replies latest jw friends
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Dismembered
I found that elders who have kids, have two sets of rules. One for the congregation, and NONE for their own family. Many are the biggest hypocrites I've ever seen.
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minimus
Have you had much experience with the dreaded ELDRESS ? You know, she ALWAYS tells you what you are supposed to do. The one that loves directing the ministerial servants and the dumb, weaker elders. She LOVES to counsel from her throne, I mean seat, when she gives a comment.
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kat7302
In my own experience, Id have to agree with the majority on here and say that as an Elders daughter, I probably had a stricter upbringing than most. The only perks Ive seen about the Elders is when it comes to their own wrongdoing, then the covering up begins. In my own case, dad wasnt only an Elder but also the Chairman of the HLC comittee for Wales (and still is).when we did get together as a family not so long ago and had a big discussion about the past, one of the things dad did say was that he probably did sell me and my older sister out BECAUSe he was an Elder and therefore concerned about his own reputation.
I dont think the children of JW elders get it easier, if anything, its a longer road to travel.
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Lady Lee
As an elder's wife we lived in fear. My girls were held to impossible standards. We were all expected to be perfect role models. The stress on all three of us was incredible and made me very sick.
He never spoke of private matters to me. I learned most of what was going on because as the youngest elder's wife many of the younger wives came to me with their problems. None were so serious that I would have repeated them to my husband. Thankfully I was never in that position. But most people knew that I was a good person to listen to them and offer support without opening a Bible evey 5 seconds.
The other elder's wives were pretty good except for a couple. One was Ms Gossip. If we wanted something known we told her. She was a special pioneer so got out on service with a lot of different people so was able to spread the stories faster than wildfire.
The other wife was a pain. She really took glory by being an elder's wife. She was the only one of color and she used that to put other JWs of color down. It was sad because no one wanted anything to do with her. She also was clearly the boss in that house. And she yelled and and beat her kids. No one respected her and certainly no one went to her when they had a problem.
Oh gosh now I am thinking of 2 others in another cong I was in. One was a real nasty b*tch. Thought it was her job to tell everyone what to do. The other loved to tell dirty jokes. What a pair those two were.
I'm glad I got my girls out when they were 12 and 8. Enough damage was done even by that time but they are both free now and didn't have to go through the teen years as a JW like I did.
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minimus
If we wanted something known we told her.......she was a special pioneer.....This just confirms my thought that many people go out in service just to be busybodies and get the latest gossip.
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Prisca
This just confirms my thought that many people go out in service just to be busybodies and get the latest gossip.
I disagree.
Witnesses go out witnessing because they think they are in the "last days" and that the preaching work needed to be done. Many went out through "encouragement" (aka peer pressure) from family, friends, elders.
I think that being busybodies and gossiping was a way of keeping themselves occupied when witnessing with the same car group for the 4th time that week!
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minimus
PRISCA, a few really think they must preach to save lives. Most of the people I know admit they go out because of the SOCIAL time not the spiritual. Drive around with any C O and the first thing they want to do is go for coffee and TALK and maybe visit somebody.I know of 1 sister who regularly auxillaries 5 times a year. She does it because of peer pressure and so that she can find out what the latest gossip is.
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Prisca
mimimus,
You must be in a very "slack" congregation. Most COs I know push JWs out into the field, and coffee breaks were looked down upon by some.
As for pioneering and gossip, I think gossip is the by-product of pioneering, not the other way round.
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minimus
yes Prisca, most C O 's push JW"S in the field while the CO and elder that was driving went on a "special call" that included a coffee stop......believe me, been there and done that MANY times.