I started reading ex-JW internet boards like this about 3 or 4 years ago. At that time, I had been out of the organisation - and perfectly happy - for about twenty years. And one day during a slow afternoon in the office - I typed " Jehovah" into a search engine (something that had never occurred to me before in my many years online prior to that) and WHAM! a whole world of ex-JW essays, experiences, anecdotes, and sad and funny stories was open to me.
Like many of us here, I became quickly addicted, and reading H2O at first, and then this forum, JWD, became an almost daily habit. Again, like many of us, I fairly soon got to like my favourite posters, and would never miss anything posted by Amazing, Englishman, Lee Elder, AlanF, Farkel and various others too numerous to mention.
I had long been satisfied in my own mind about how empty and void were the hopes and promises held out by the WTS to its victims and how riddled with errors and outright dishonesty were many of their books and magazines. But now I was reading material that validated and amplified the somewhat vague and unformed notions I had about precisely what was wrong with being a Jehovahs Witness.
For example, I knew about the disfellowshipping teaching, and even had a brush with it: at the time of my leaving, I had said some indiscreet things to a couple of shepherding elders about the Society, and was up before a JC on a charge of apostasy. (I wrote a post about it). Miraculously enough, I survived and never was df'd. I was glad about that, not because I cared a fig about the Watchtower or my "standing with Jehovah" but simply because of the effect such a thing would have had on my trusting, believing parents and the social awkwardness that would have arisen in my half-in half-out family with a df'd person among them.
As I said, I was acquainted with the Df policy, and knew how it worked, but it wasn't until I started reading here, and was exposed to some of the truly horrible experiences and dreadful stories told by some here that it really hit home to me how horrific, unchristian and controlling that policy is. Reading that material on the internet really sharpened up my thinking and gave me a better appreciation of how ungodly and pharisaic the Society really is.
I say all this as background. The Internet has been a real education to me about how rotten the Society really is. Before, I kind-of knew that it was a false religion, but I really had no idea about how bad the leadership really were. Three years ago, I might have told someone that the GB was wrong about things , but basically sincere and kindly in intent. Three years of reading this site, and others like it, put paid to that notion.
Which brings me to the point about the Watchtower cover-up on the whole paedophile issue.
I must admit, the first time I read a post by Bill Bowen (Silentlambs) about a year-and-a-half ago, I was somewhat bemused. I thought to myself: " Why is this chap making SUCH a big fuss about this issue? It might be a problem locally in his congregation, but this is never going to trouble Brooklyn. This kind of thing, devastating as it is when it does happen, must be vanishingly rare. He's barking up the wrong tree here, the Watchtower needs opposing alright, but not on a crackpot issue like this! " Twenty years out of it , and I here I was still thinking like a Witness.
Because I had personally never been affected by this issue, and had no experience of it, I was assuming that it simply didn't go on, or not to any great extent. I was not, to my knowledge, ever acquainted with any victims, and was quite prepared to believe it hardly ever happened. But, of course, it's that " to my knowledge" which is the big flaw in that line of reasoning.
This business about taking problems to the Elders and their desire to keep the good name of the congregation beyond reproach means, of course, I may very well have been acquainted with paedophiles and their victims, just never known about it.
It was Bill Bowens insight to see the widespread nature of the problem, and his integrity and drive to get it publicised that has led in a major way to the high profile the issue has now attained. I can clearly see how wrong I was in my first assessment of Bill Bowens post, but it does to illustrate how easily the faithful dubs can fall back into denial in the face of the Panorama and Dateline shows. "" Oh, no! It doesnt go on! Not in my congregation! We'd know about it! Its all wicked apostate lies! " I was halfway towards that thinking myself at first, and Ive been out and adamantly opposed for twenty years!
It seems to me the handling of this issue has been an absolute touchstone, a litmus test for the Watchtower. Faced with this issue, the question being posed to the leadership comes down to: Are you prepared to care for and protect the victims, or more concerned with your reputation and standing in the eyes of men?
And what an answer they have given.
It rather seems that they think they'll be able to weather the storm and wait until the fuss dies down. But, of course, this issue is absolutely not going to go away. It will drain money, time, management attention and resources away from their set goals (printing and selling literature) and will be a millstone round their neck until they publicly recant their position. The two-witness thing is an absurdity that even most faithful dubs will have a lot of trouble swallowing.
Recant they must, and eventually will, even if they dont see it yet. But even after the humblest of apologies to the victims, they will still have been hugely damaged by all this.
Its been half-suggested by various posters on this forum that Ted Jaracz is much more culpable in all of this than simply being the negligent architect of a flawed policy. There are, it seems, unproven allegations that he himself has a molesting history. If that's true, all this publicity will bring some evidence to the surface, for sure. You cant be a paedophile without creating victims, and a smoking gun will appear if there's anything to it.
But even if none of that is true, given that he has, apparently, made many, many enemies at Bethel over his years of tyranny there, what an opportune this would be to mount a coup and unseat him. Think of the benefits to the Society! They could make a clean break with the past policy and blame the whole thing on him. He could take the rap.
Perhaps, as the survival instincts of the Organisation kick in, something like that might actually happen. Who knows?
Anyway, I just wanted to say: Brilliant job Bill Bowen! And everyone else associated with Silentlambs too.
Duncan.
Edited by - Duncan on 24 July 2002 13:9:38
Edited by - Duncan on 25 July 2002 5:10:48