I disfellowshipped my parents this week..

fulano

I just wrote them a mail, telling them to not contact me any more under any circumstances, illness or death (79 and 83 years old). Unless they leave the cult and would apologize for our f*'.ed-up upbringing which ruined our whole life.

Village Idiot

Harsh but then I'm not in your shoes.

wannaexit

As Village Idiot says, its a bit harsh but none of us have walked in your shoes. I think that our parents worked with the skills they had at the time and at this late stage of their life, telling them to leave the cult would be hard to do. If your parents are like mine, their whole network of friends are jehovahs witnesses and its not that easy to cut all ties.

But then you have to do what is good for you and what you think is right.

fulano

Thank you both for your understanding and not judging. Our upbringing was in a third generation fanatic jw world.

Now my brother and I stopped we were set apart at the funeral of my grandmother, not even informed about the death and funeral of our oldest uncle ( circuit-overseer). Excluded from our huge family inheritance from Java. So we both wrote the same mail, decided to shock there silly world and df them before they get the chance to do so to us.

ducatijoe

Harsh... I too was raised JW. I am 60 now. I left a few years ago , on my own accord and am doing great.

I would never be so harsh with my 85 year old mother for staying in.

Magnum

I would not say it's harsh. Fulano, I won't judge you. I don't know your circumstances. I was actually giving thought to something similar myself today. My family members are so blind and gullible. They think Anthony Morris is so wonderful and that something is wrong with me. If I tried to reason with them, they would shun me. If they can shun me simply for not believing what they do, then why can't I do that to them?

apologize for our f*'.ed-up upbringing which ruined our whole life.

I fully understand that. Much of my life was ruined, too.

Butyoucanneverleave

You do what you need to do to make you happy. Or at least not miserable abiding by their rules. Life is to damn short and it sounds like this cult has sucked enough out of it.

umbertoecho

Were you a witness? Or have you been disfellowshipped? If they were still talking with you inspite of what the org says.......regarding shunning those on the outside. Then it may be harsh. Then again. Like the others here, I don't know what has happened in your life.

dubstepped

I don't judge you at all. You have every right to your feelings. People put parents up on a magical pedestal and take crap from them that they'd never take from anyone else simply because they birthed them and now owe them something. Yeah, I know, you're supposed to respect your parents. Of course, they're supposed to hold up their end of that bargain first, and if they don't, then maybe they don't earn that respect. Plenty of parents abuse their kids and then think they're owed something after messing up their kids. None of us can judge whether what you did was harsh because none of us knows what your life was like or your relationship with them. I can identify on some level with wanting to disfellowship them first.

Oh, and by the way, don't they have to apologize for like a year or so first, before you'll speak with them again. Right their wrongs. Maybe come over for dinner and watch you eat while being ignored. That's more in line with the terminology that you used.

ToesUp

My mate and I finally (after many years) realized that we have been shunned MANY years prior to our decision to fade. We feel that we were just no good enough.

Now...WE...have decided to shun certain family members who could have cared less about us for MANY years. It feels good!

I disfellowshipped my parents this week..

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