Don't shun if money is involved (page 2)

minimus

I would like to recommend a slightly different approach. Why not arrange a meeting more than a few times, in places where the 2 of you will be seen chatting? You know, places like Dunkin Donut or the favorite coffee shop on a Saturday morning where all the Witnesses congregate for break?

ChrisVance

My cousin called me severals times during the day. At 4:30 I answered the phone. I told him I thought it was pretty hypocritical to only talk to me when he wanted something. He said, "You didn't call me when my wife died." He didn't call me when my whole family disowned me either.

I have to check it with my lawyer, but it appears that he and my brother. both jdobs, are trying to pull a fast one on me. It's a good thing I didn't sign anything.

To be continued.

Scully

Chris:
<<<<I told him I thought it was pretty hypocritical to only talk to me when he wanted something. He said, "You didn't call me when my wife died.">>>>

What could you possibly WANT or GET from him when his wife died??

Apples and oranges.

It probably wouldn't have made any difference if you had called when his wife died. I know of situations where people who have left the JWs (not DFd or DAd either, some never baptized) made condolence calls on bereaved friends or relatives, only to have the phone hung up on them when they identified themselves. In lots of cases I haven't even been TOLD that so-and-so has passed away until quite some time after the fact. And my family knows FULL WELL that they would be the only source of the information. So I can only surmise that they don't tell me because (a) they don't want me to show up for the Memorial service or (b) they want to make me appear to be an uncaring jerk for not going to the Memorial service.

Anyway, it's a good thing you're involving your lawyer now. Seems that your cousin's and brother's pushing to close the deal quickly was for a reason. Namely, to screw you out of something. How much you wanna bet they're trashing you over it too to the family and "the friends"?? Maybe you'll be getting more phone calls from other relatives for being so "difficult" with your cousin....

Love, Scully

scumrat

Hey Chris, doesn't that just frost your ass, calling you out of the blue and talking to you like they just saw you yesterday. I was taught to treat people the way that I would want

to be treated, however now, I treat people the way they treat me. It's a self-respect thing..

Room 215

Chris,

Scarlet is right about the latter-day Pharisees granting leniency when it comes to involvement with a DF in business/money matters. It worked for me like a silver bullet one day when a JW informer ratted me out for being in a restaurant with a DF. I got hauled into the back room; they put down their rubber hoses in record time after I told them it was a ``business matter,'' an effort to secure repayment of a large sum of money loaned by my boss to the DF. I exaggerated the amount owed, of course, but the whole thing was dropped in less than a minute.

For all their pretensions to spirituality, money talks; indeed, fairly shouts, to JWs and their masters in Brooklyn/Patterson.

mommy1

Hey Chris, Good for you having a lawyer check those papers for you.

ozziepost

But Roomie, did you get your money?

Cheers, Ozzie

Valis

Valis - he'd do anything for money.

Huh?

Sincerely,

District Overbeer

ChrisVance

Scully - I did feel like calling him when his wife died, but I was afraid he'd either hang up on me or tell me he couldn't talk to a disfellowshiped person.

scumrat - you bet it frosts my ass. more about that later.

Room215 - interesting.

mommy1 - of course my lawyer wasn't available today, but I'm waiting until she is.

Valis - yea, I don't know where that response came from either, sorry.

This thing has made me realize just how angry I am, not only becuase of the shunning but also because of all the abuse I've received as a gay person from this church. Ever since I was 11 I've known I was gay and I internalized all the homophobia this church continually spouts.Then the only reason I get married is because the elders tell me it will "cure" me. Not only was this unfair to me, but also to the women I married. Idiots. Of course, I didn't go to college, (I'm doing it now at 52.) Then after 21 years of trying to be hetrosexual I leave my wife and give her way too much in the community property settlement becuase of all the guilt this church heaped upon me.Now there's the shunning and because of this cult I can't even have a normal relationship with my daughter. She's says she has no problem with my being gay, but she feels she must follow the orders of the borg.

When I left my x I gave her the yearly payments on this real estate contract that is the center of the whole controversy. The Com prop agreement says she gets the payments until she remarries, dies, or cohabits with a man. This cousin who bought the farm from my family wants to sell it along with all the other adjoining property his owns. The real estate contracts says he can't payoff the balance without the sellers consent, seller being defined as my mother, my brother, and me. (mother and brother are devout jdubs who have shuned me for the last 10 years.) His buyer doesn't want to take over the contract because it's nine percent and he won't buy unless he can buy the whole parcial The sale was 16 years ago when interest rates were higher. The cousin called me and suggested I negogiate with my xwife to split the proceeds, about $41,000. I'm sure she won't go along with that and I'm determined not to let her get the entire 41,000 at once. The contract would go on for seven more years, in which time it's possible she may marry or possibly die. This would then return the payments to me.

If I understand the contract right no payoff is possible without my signature, which explains why my cousin was being to nice. This means my brother and mother can't get their $41,000. Actually, the cousin's lawyer tipped me off on this. He said I'd want to be nice and sign so my mother and brother can get there money. HEHE. When I last talked to my cousin he said he could pay off my brother and mother and make arrangements to continue paying my x without my signing, but he doesn't like the idea. That's when I figured it out. He can't pay off my mother and brother without my signature, but they were going to go ahead and do it figuring I'd want my mother to get her share of the money and wouldn't say anything. Wrong. Funny how they always think that we who are shunned have no reason to be angry. Actually a similar things happened when I was still a jdub and of course I didn't say anything because I was such a dutifull son.

The contract says if my mother who is 80 dies her share of the payments are split between me and my brother. If she's paid off and dies before seven years are up I'm cheated out of my share. Anything that's left over would go to my brother. I'm sure I'm not in her will. So this payoff thing is defintely not to my advantage. Yesterday at about 5:00pm I emailed the cousin's lawyer and told him I'd figured out what they were up to. Funny thing, I haven't heard from him.

I've decided to use the whole thing to my advantage. If it's true that all payoffs are off without my signature, and I think it is, I'm going to tell my cousin and brother that all they have to is convince my x to let me have 3/4 quarters of the payoff. She's recieving a $1000 a month on my pension so I don't feel sorry for her. If they can't convince her they can make up the difference themselves. They both have lots of money. I'll even overlook that fact that they tried to cheat me. If they don't like my idea I'm better off leaving things the way they are. Then I'll explain that since they support a religion that has emotionally abused me most of my life, (not to mention participating in the abuse) I have no qualms about being so hard nosed with them.

As a side note, my mother has very little income so she pays little or no income tax on her yearly payments. If she gets it all at once she'll pay at least $10,000 in income tax and lose the nine percent interest. My jdub brother isn't thinking about her interests, he wants his $41,000. The cousin said my brother called my x saying she should be "christian" about the whole thing. Yes, he wants his money. That's my biggest fear, is that she'll be christian.

Any thoughts on this?

Scully

Chris:

If I'm understanding all of this correctly, perhaps it's time you arranged a meeting with your mother and ex-wife, because it sounds like they are also going to be at a disadvantage if the deal between your brother and cousin goes through.

You can set it all out on paper and show them how this transaction will impact on them detrimentally, and then tell them you are looking out for their interests, not just your own, in with holding your signature on the documents. IMO, that's the truly "christian" thing to do.

Once you've got them on your side, the three of you can make a case with the elders against your cousin and brother for trying to swindle you out of a large sum of money. (Remember the story of Ananias and Sapphira??) Using their own 'rules' and 'judicial system' against them should shut them up in lightning speed. And no love lost between you and them either. Plus you get to keep what's yours, and hopefully your mom and ex-wife will appreciate the benevolent gesture.

Payback is a grand thing, isn't it??

Love, Scully

Don't shun if money is involved

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