on the subject of sex

by Vivamus 20 Replies latest social relationships

  • Vivamus
    Vivamus

    I am being very serious here, I am having some thoughts on the subject of sex.

    What is it that determines the way you view sex? Is it upbringing, or genes? Is the term reverse psychology applicable for us who have been in the Borg? Being in the Borg meant having _no_ sex unless you were married, so, according to upbringing, that would mean being chaste or extremely hard to get. Throw in reverse psychology, and you get sexually liberated people.

    So, I have a few questions, did any of you become sexually wild after you left the Borg? And if so ... did you settle down after a while, are there any regrets over the wild period? Or, were you always wild, and being in the Borg just made you feel miserable because you couldn't act on it? Or, did your views on sex didn't change at all?

    Just wondering on a Monday afternoon.

    Any thoughts?

    Viv.

  • Xander
    Xander

    Hmmm...married while in the bOrg, still married, so 'not really' to sexually wild.

    Well....actually, now that you mention it.........oh, okay, that's a "yes".

    Views on sex didn't actually change much, just suddenly not having to feel guilty for having them.

    Is it upbringing, or genes?

    That's a really good question.

    Obviously, genetics play a major role - a powerful sex drive helps our species survive.

    But what role do genetics have in, say, sexual preference? Interest level? Even fetishes?

    ???

  • Satanus
    Satanus

    My beliefs on sex have changed, but my life is the same. *sigh* I must have some issues to work on. I never went wild either, after i was kicked out. I'm from a long line of fundy conservatives, even though i don't believe the shit. Maybe some of it is genetic.

    SS

  • Simon
    Simon

    Like most things, it's probably a combination of both upbringing and genetics.

    We haven't gone mad but we enjoy ourselves a lot more now

    Still hoping for a Britney / Shania / Me thing though ...

  • SYN
    SYN

    I've been wild since I hit puberty, and I've been *physically* wild since I left the Dubs, and I'm not planning on changing anytime soon

  • Cicatrix
    Cicatrix

    Hehe-what a coincidence that you should post this question the day after my first wild post-Borg weekend lol.I was pretty uninhibited and well educated before I was a JW,so when I was baptised I had to reign myself in quite a bit(even wrote Bethel on a few issues when I was studying-interestingly got a different answer than what was printed in the Watchtower on the oral sex issue.Alas, I didn't keep the letter).I'm still in my "Whoopie,I'm Free!" stage,so don't know how much I'll settle down.I was baptised when I was a teen,so I don't really know what my personal views are as of yet, other than to say they are definitely NOT of the Borg mentality! I sure am enjoying exploring the issue though:)

    I think sexual views are a combination of genetics and upbringing.I have very, ahem,sexually active non JW parents.My upbringing was pretty liberal,with healthy boundaries set(no incest,make sure you're sexually responsible,etc.).I was allowed access to their books on pregnancy and birth when I was quite young,and as a young adult,I was allowed to read books on sexuality(not porn,although I did know where it was hidden and snuck a look at this too).I think this made me more sexually responsible,not less(nothing like a flowery description of STDs to make one aware of the importance of safety).I think because of this, I always had a hard time with the Borg definition of marital sex.I could never get what they meant about "not throwing off all restraint in marriage".

    In contrast,I've had several friends who were raised with a different ideology of sexuality.This caused them no end of problems later in life when their perceived view of sexuality and their biological urges just didn't match up.

    The most heartbreaking are my friends who had their joy of sexuality totally obliterated by perverts who sexually molested them when they were children.Seeing the indelible marks left on these poor victims entire lives has made me extremely intolerant of molesters!

  • crownboy
    crownboy

    Like SS, my views have changed, but not any actual activity (I'm still a virgin, but hey, I'm still young ).

    Vivamus, do you plan on telling us your answer?

  • Vivamus
    Vivamus

    Well, I myself am also in the whoopie I am free stage.

    I have no frame of reference to a possible earlier behaviour though, I was a good girl until I got kicked out, so all my experience is after my JW life. And so, I was wondering, is it really me, or is it still a bit "the Borg didnt allow it, so now I am happily doing it" ?

    Edited by - Vivamus on 19 August 2002 17:2:10

  • Cicatrix
    Cicatrix

    I don't know the specifics of what you're thinking about,so I can't really advise you.I know for me,I'm so new out of the Borg, I just go with my gut feeling-but as I do have some experience,it's a little different for me.If you're comfortable with discussing it,you can email me.

  • SYN
    SYN

    Viv: Keep it safe, keep it clean, keep it country, and you should be fine. If you do it because you really like someone, and not just "to get laid", then that will make you feel great! Just be a careful girl, and have fun! We don't want any Vivamus Juniors running around, now do we? At least, not for the forseeable future

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