HOW DRUNK ARE YOU Test results...

by mevirginia 16 Replies latest jw friends

  • mevirginia
    mevirginia

    mevirginia
    Senior Member

    United States of America
    Posts: 57
    Since: Jun 12, 2002

    Sorry everyone I edited no content honest. I just moved the thread to try and fix the formatting.

    It was un-readable as it was, and I new no other way to repair it. without bothering Simon.

    LMAO!

    Test results are in

    I heard this on the news last night, thought it was funny. It took a team of researchers to put this one on the books.

    There seems to be no end to the knowledge one can obtain these days by attending a university to extend ones education.

    Results of recent studies on the consumption of alcohol and the effects it has on ones attractiveness to the opposite sex are in.

    It has now been shown that 4 beers or 2 glasses of wine will make the opposite sex (or same if gay) appear more attractive.

    Students and their professors conducted studies at a university.

    mevirginia [ Profile Above ] one

    Edited by - mevirginia on 21 August 2002 1:19:40

    Edited by - mevirginia on 21 August 2002 2:55:8

  • mevirginia
    mevirginia

    COMF
    Emperor Class
    I'm applying for grant money to fund research into the effect of multiple ..orgasms on interpersonal relationships. United States of America
    Posts: 2587
    Since: Mar 16, 2001

    Edited by - mevirginia on 21 August 2002 1:7:11

  • DakotaRed
    DakotaRed

    WARNING ON BEER!

    IMPORTANT NOTICE

    Police warn all male clubbers, party goers and unsuspecting pub regulars to be more alert and cautions when accepting a drink offer from a female.

    There is a date rape drug going around called "beer" and it appears in a liquid form. The drug is being used by female sexual predators at parties to persuade male victims to have sex with them.

    "Beer" is available anywhere. All females have to do is persuade a guy to consume a few units of "beer" and simply ask him home for no-strings-attached sex. Men are rendered helpless against such attacks.

    After several "beers" men will often succumb to performing sex acts on horrific looking women whom they would never normally be attracted to.

    Men often wake up after having "beer" with only hazy memories of what happened to them the night before...just a vague feeling that something bad occurred.

    At other times these unfortunate men might be conned into a familiar scam known as "a relationship" ...apparently men are easier victims for this scam after the "beer" has been administered and they have already been sexually attacked.

    Forward this alert to every male you know.

    However, if you fall victim to this insidious drug and the predatory women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter in an open manner with a bunch of similarly affected victims.

    For your nearest support group, look up "Taverns" in the yellow pages.

  • mevirginia
    mevirginia

    Notperfectyet and Comf and Heaven please excuse me for moving the threads.

    I thought they were great and wanted to keep them included.

    notperfectyet
    Senior Member
    Posts: 168
    Since: Jan 22, 2001..
    I think the same brillliant team of researchers came up with this one

    too........I wonder if they have any Grant money left?

    ******

    Due to increasing products liability litigation, 
    American liquor manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion 
    that the following   warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties
    of 
    			alcohol 
    			containers:
    					 
    WARNING: 
    			The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering
    what   the hell happened to your bra.
    				 
      
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think 
    you are   whispering   when you are not.
    				 
      
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor 
    in dancing   like a   retard.
    				 
    				 
      
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to 
    tell your   friends over and over again that you love them.
    				 
      
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that  
    ex-lovers   are really dying for you to telephone them at four in
    the morning.
    				 
      
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can  
    logically converse with other members of the opposite sex 
    without spitting.
    					 
      
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you have  
    mystical Kung Fu powers,resulting in you getting your ass kicked.
    				 
      
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to 
    roll over in the   morning and see something really scary.
    				 
      
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of  
    inexplicable rug   burns on the forehead, knees and lower back.
    					 
      
    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion 
    that you are  
    tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.

    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you're invisible or worse, bulletproof!

    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.

    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause a disturbance in the time-space continuum, whereby gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.

    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.

    WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the number one factor in having a coyote date.

    WARNING: the consumption of ackahol may Mack you tink you can tipe real gode.

    Edited by - mevirginia on 21 August 2002 1:14:19

  • mevirginia
    mevirginia

    Heaven
    Jedi Member

    United States of America
    Posts: 1487
    Since: Jan 31, 2002..
    OMG So Funny.... .Seriously, I found this all out in high school.

  • mevirginia
    mevirginia

    LOL@DakotaRed

    With a warning lable like that the beer would have to increase in size from 12oz to at least 32oz containers. ;)

  • Golden Girl
    Golden Girl

    So that's why they made up the song "The Girls All Get Prettier At Closing Time!

    Golden Girl...

  • Scarlet
    Scarlet

    I heard about this on the news this morning I started laughing, it was so funny. The news caster was acting like he had never known this.

  • mevirginia
    mevirginia

    scarlet

    The news caster was acting like he had never known this.
    LOL Maybe the news caster drinks too much and had a revelation
  • mevirginia
    mevirginia

    I thought more drinkers would respond.

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