DO YA MISS "THE SWEET FELLOWSHIP"?

minimus

One of the major reasons that a disfellowshipped or disassociated person has for coming back to "Jehovah's Organization" is that perhaps they will miss the "sweet fellowship". After hearing comments regarding the KM article on how to treat disfellowshipped ones, I must wonder why anyone of sound mind would think a disfellowshipped person would miss anything from the organization. Viewing persons as "dead" while out of the organization would not make one feel anxious to return to Jehovah's loving arrangement through the organization.Whoever coined the term about missing "the sweet fellowship" was pretty clever. There is nothing "sweet" about the gossippers, slanderers and backbiters that talk about someone who left. And regarding the "fellowship", look at all the comments made on this board about being treated with disrespect and callousness. If while "in good standing" a person is treated miserably, what would it be like if they ever got reinstated? ....SO, DO YOU MISS THE SWEET FELLOWSHIP???

Wolfgirl

Um....*thinks really hard*...give me some time to think about this...NO.

Xena

Actually minimus sometimes I DO miss it....*sigh* it was nice having built in friends, even though now I know they weren't REAL friends.

I miss the get-togethers sometimes too....

So am I sick or what????

In_between_days

I have to admit that I really miss my friends in the org. If you moved in the right youth circles within the congregations, you could build up quite a big friendship network very quickly. I had been to alot of congregations and went to all the right "clique" partys, so had built up a network of around 80 friends. I now have around 5 close friends. It's hard when you have to actually make an effort to make friends from the ground basis, because you are so used to having them already made for you.

It's a whole new life now though, and you've got to be positive. The friends I make now, I find are far more caring than most I had in the org, and most are completely disgusted when I tell them about shunning. They assure me that these are not "Real friends". There is a certain girl I was very close too, and a guy that was like my big brother and I miss them terribly. They are lovely people. They do not shun me, but I see them very rarely.

Xena

Thank you in-between for not making me feel like a freak for missing that stuff

I am working on my network of new and improved friends, but you are right it is harder when you have to start from the ground up....but the end results are worth the effort

outnfree

((((Xena))))

I miss the "sweet" fellowship, too. There WAS some of that, mostly when socializing.

I do NOT miss what the Borg THINKS of as the "sweet fellowship" which is unitedly worshipping Jehovah with like-minded, controlled, narrowly-focussed "brethren" the world over. (Although it was nice to be able to walk into a KH anywhere in the world and feel accepted as long as you were dressed modestly and carried a NWT! ) I do NOT miss the superficiality of the conversations or the 'brotherly love.' For the most part, the love WAS superficial, sad to say.

out

Edited to ((((((In_between))))), too!

Edited by - outnfree on 23 August 2002 10:21:11

gumby

Xena:

it was nice having built in friends, even though now I know they weren't REAL friends. I miss the get-togethers sometimes too....

Xena....I wouldn't say they weren't REAL FRIENDS. They put their religious devotion ahead of friends because to them it is a life or death situation. They feel it is in your BEST interest to do what they are supposed to do. I'm sure they still love you and wish they COULD talk to you.

Minimus:

Sounds as though you still wonder about many things regarding the Borg. I was told it can take several years to shake it off......in many area...much longer.

I miss all my friends....they were all I knew my whole life......and I miss them, I want to call them.You know what? I was wondering how much response I would get if I called some of my old buddies. Perhaps they would be glad to hear from me .

If I do....I better do it before the August KM is covered.

nice thread.....thanks Minimus

Xena

You are right about some of them gumby.....lol the tough love concept in full force isn't it?

Funny I know deep down my sisters and old friends still care about me, but they feel it is in my best interests to shun me. How can you hate someone so utterly clueless???

Thank you for the hug out

There really are some great people on this board!

dsgal

I don't miss a damn thing about it because I never had any friends there anyway.The kh was the coldest place I have ever been to in my life.My son and I were never invited to any of their social get-togethers,and when we would find out about it later,they would make no apology for leaving us out.Every year right before X-mas they would all get together and have a talent show.Nothing competitive,just different ones getting up and singing,telling jokes or whatever.Two of the elder's wives were in charge of invitations and it was supposed to be for the entire congregation but we never received one.I am not Df'd or Da'd,I just faded away because I got tired of all the cliqeishness.I just didn't see the christian love that jesus said would identify his followers.Sorry if I rambled,just saw an opportunity to vent.

roybatty

To some extent I do miss it but the feeling is less and less as I have made new friends. Since I grew up as a JW, what I still miss is having friends whom Ive known since childhood. Like most ex-JWs, Ive made dozens and dozens of new friends but there is still something about having a friend whom youve known since you were a kid. From time to time I do miss certain buddies. Those with whom you shared certain important moments in your youth (and were later teased about!). But now that I think about it, I havent thought about those individuals in a long time. It kind of reminds of the emotions one goes through when getting divorced.

Regarding the get-togethers, I think I have been fairly lucky. It was very cool have such a large pool of friends (was super easy to get a football game going). Though I dont have 5 million friends anymore, I do have much better friends now. Theres a lot of comfort in that. Just about every weekend that were together, my kids and I have been invited over by someone, either a relative or friend. Its something wonderful knowing that youre being included because of who you are not what you are.

DO YA MISS "THE SWEET FELLOWSHIP"?

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