NEVER MEET ALONE WITH A SISTER!!!

by minimus 25 Replies latest jw friends

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  minimus

  "elders have to learn to keep the butts covered"......only with females? Not males, per Society.
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  Scully

  minimus:
  >>>"elders have to learn to keep the butts covered"......only with females? Not males, per Society.<<<

  The WTS is really being short-sighted in its gender specific ass-covering tactics/counsel. Obviously the transference/counter-transference issue has come up already, otherwise they would not have felt the need to offer this "counsel". However, it's also been pointed out, gays who are trying to be "good JWs", or are in denial over their sexual orientation, could develop 'romantic feelings' the same way sisters might.

  It just makes sense to have another person with you, regardless of the gender of the person who's being counselled or receiving a shepherding call.

  I'm not offended that the WTS recommends that it be done with sisters only. But I do think they are being stupid and short-sighted to think that two men - one giving and the other receiving counsel - cannot have a 'your word against mine' situation develop. A corroborating witness to the discussion would hopefully eliminate that possibility.

  Love, Scully
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  Mary

  Our presiding overseer got disfellowshipped 2 years ago for having an affair with a sister in the congregation who was the same age as his son. It had been going on for 3 or 4 years and it all started when he would go over to "counsel" her on the sorry state of her marriage. (ya, right buddy). Like so many others, she got married very young (16) had her first kid at 17, was brain-dead to the extreme, and was totally infatuated with this elder as he could be very charming. (half the sisters in the Hall had the hots for him). To her, he also represented the "father figure".

  Anyhoo, he ended up leaving his wife of 27 years for this total bimbo, she leaves her husband and their two kids, and they both get DF'd.

  Maybe this is why they don't want elders counselling sisters alone....................
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  Salud

  I agree with Highlander, this is not a bad policy. Many businesse's/company's adhere to this policy. So I don't see anything wrong with it. You hear of co-workers esp boss/worker relationships all the time and in fact it is prohibited in many companies.

  When I was and elder we were told of the exp. of a MS meeting alone with a sister in the 'back room'. He took it upon himself to counsel her on something, well she took offence and proceeded to rip off her blouse and went running out of the room and accused him of trying to make a move on her. Well subsequently he was delted. It was not until a couple of years later that she confessed to making it all up. But the damage had been done to his reputation not to mention the turmoil that it caused him and his family.
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  LB

  I know of a case from many years ago. Two sisters both had a cruise on a married elder. They were competitive and eventually told others that they both were having an affair with the elder. Said elder got DFed. He did get reinstated after one of the sisters died and the other got to feeling guilty about her lies.

  It's a protection for both sides I guess. I agree with it.

  I also know of an elder that had a bad crush on a sister. It was so obvious. Both were married and she seems to be very faithful to her husband and in love with him. The elder just waxed on and on about sister gorgeous and how spiritual, beautiful, intelligent, ect ect ect.

  I'm very certain she would never want to be alone with this guy.
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  Country Girl

  This really is good counsel: among JW's and among corporate people. Then, their LIES cannot be corroborated. If you meet alone with a JW sister, you are setting yourself up for true disaster since it can't be PROVEN that she islying. It's better for corporate people and for elders to meet with someone there.

  Country Girl