Women. Periods, and how to cope with them ..... (page 2)

Undecided

God told Adam he would dominate the woman, but he forgot to tell him it wouldn't be for the whole month.

Ken P.

Mary

this is a good example of rules that guys should follow:

Every "Hormone Hostage" knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands. This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend or significant other.

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing THAT?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: Wow! Look at you!

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: Could we be overreacting?
SAFEST: Here's fifty dollars.

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?

DANGEROUS: What did you DO all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't overdo it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe.

PMS TOP 8 THINGS PMS STANDS FOR :

Pass My Shotgun
Psychotic Mood Shift
Perpetual Munching Spree
People Make Me Sick
Provide Me with Sweets
Pardon My Sobbing
Pack My Stuff
Purchase Me Sugar

Q: How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One. Only ONE!! And do you know WHY? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb! They don't even know that the bulb is BURNED OUT! They would sit in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it out. And, once they figured it out, they wouldn't be able to find the light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CUPBOARD for the past 17 YEARS! But if they did, by some miracle, actually find them 2 DAYS LATER, the chair they dragged to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE WRAPPER THE STUPID @*!#$% LIGHT BULBS CAME IN! WHY? BECAUSE NO-ONE EVER
CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES OF GARBAGE THAT ARE 12' DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE. THE HOUSE? - IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS #@*$

I'm sorry, what did you say?

Edited by - Mary on 27 August 2002 9:18:0

nita6368

One more Mary,

Possible Murder Suspect (You notice thats suspect not victim :)

Guys honestly even though you have to deal with us during that time believe me us dealing with ourselves is tons worse. Our looks change, my husband can tell just by looking at me. Our hair refuses to cooperate. We can't sleep soundly and are so tired we can hardly hold up our head, not to mention cramps. To top it all off we literally walk around wanting to hurt someone, just not sure who or why or do we really care. So mentioning that we are crabby or moody just feeds the fire. Works best for me to be left alone.

Celtic

irritable blinkin' old sods thats all i have to say

rollin me eyes

celty

Shutterbug

You married men haven't seen anything yet !! Just you wait until your wife goes thru menopause. Man, they go totally nuts at that time in their lives and us poor men are supposed to be "understanding" even thought we have no basis for understanding what they are going thru. They usually come thru the ordeal ok and then they quit cooking, in more ways than one. If you don't understand what that last sentenace means, you will soon enough.

waiting

True story - when I was in early 20's, working with a couple of other young married women.

One woman's husband had a boil in area between penis & scrotum, went to doctor, doctor lanced it, and he had to wear a taxpax pad for several days....as anyone who's had a boil lanced knows the sore drains. ugh.

Well.....................the man wore his pad (and tampax belt) and walked reaaaaaaaaaal funny during that time......all the while moaning and groaning. After a couple of days, he walked passed his wife and said:

"I promise, I'll never make light of your time of the month again. This is so gross."

Honest! As she told us, we all laughed.....'caused we agreed with him - and it had already been happening to us every friggin' month for over a decade.....with about 3 more decades to look forward to. But we were glad that at least ONE man knew how we felt, at least physically.

waiting

SYN

Erm...rub their feet? Run away? Buy them chocolate? My PMS handling experience is limited...

butalbee

Just be happy that she GOT her period!!

cruzanheart

Big Tex figures that our daughter is going to go through puberty about the same time I hit menopause and he is already making plans to move out of our house with our son for a year, before coming back to find out who survived. Sounds like a good plan.

Nina

Simon

Well, I'm not going to touch this one with a barge pole ...

Just suffice to say that I'm suspicious of anything that bleeds for days and doesn't die

Women. Periods, and how to cope with them .....

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