I do have to admit to having a feeling of 'specialness' at times, in that I thought it was certainly special to be one of the very few who would survive Armaggedon, and feeling a bit 'lucky' to have somehow found the one body of information, the secret, which would make that possible...the teachings of the WTS. But, on the other hand, I was often troubled with the concern of just why I seemed to have found such a favored circumstance, and so many others who seemed worthy or redeemable did not. I wondered just what it was about my thought processes and theirs which made the difference between being in God's favor and out of it, when other factors such as innate goodness, kindness, selflessness, generosity, etc., were either on a similar footing as me, or heavily weighted in favor of those in the world. Certainly, it cannot be determined by looking at the standard 'fine qualities' demonstrated among those in the cong, for there is every bit as much range evident there as there is 'in the world'. A while ago, I wrote the following about this subject.
Why me?
Why me?
What did I do to deserve this?
Was I in the right place at the right time?
Is there something in me others are without?
One of a selected few saved.......a minority from billions
One of the meek.......an obedient one
Those drawn by God.......I follow
A sacred secret......what awaits!
Undeserved kindness to me......should have been someone else
A sinner......my flaws and weaknesses
Everlasting life......my reward
A survivor amid apocalyptic ruin......your deliverence is near
Why me?
What did I do to deserve this?
Was I in the wrong place at the wrong time?
Is there something in others I am without?
False hopes, empty promises, I believed......a minority from billions
Duped in distrust of my own instincts......an obedient one
They had all the answers......I followed
I'll die like everybody......what awaits
A personality imposed on me.......should have been someone else
Some say a victim of victims......my flaws and weaknesses
A painful awakening, spiritual hangover......my reward
Go out from among us, you are not of our sort......your deliverence is here
Why me?
What did I do to deserve this?
What is this place and time?
Is there something in me others are without?
I've seen "through a glass darkly"......a minority from billions
To make my own way......an obedient one
From many paths, I choose which......I follow
A life of possibilities......what awaits?
Though, Oh! who I've left behind......should have been someone else
Explore, accept, understand......my flaws and weaknesses
My life to live now......my reward
a survivor out of a tower of rubble......my deliverence is here
truman
