Why do elders not disfellowship inactive people? (page 4)

kenpodragon

Farkel

Sorry, but the odds are more in favor of what I said. Always going to be one or two exceptions, but that is not the norm.

Dragon

Farkel

: Sorry, but the odds are more in favor of what I said

I wasn't talking about odds, but addressing this blanket generalization you made:

: So if you walked away and you worry if they might hunt you down some day and DF you, don't!! They really do not give a crap any more then you do.

While you are correct that they generally won't bug you and DF you if you've been out for some YEARS, they will and DO often hunt down and DF inactive dubs who are quietly minding their own business all the time.

Furthermore, as I've pointed out, even being out for some years is not any guarantee they won't do the same thing. If there is one thing I'm sure we can agree upon it is that fading away is the safest way to escape without retribution, it is by no means guaranteed, and I want people reading who are thinking about that step to know it carries risks, too.

Farkel

Tinkerbell4125

I have a good friend that has slowly dwifted. She divorced her sorry ass husband and has been doing great! She dares them to come at her!!!

And that's all I'm gonna say about that! =;o)

Xena

I think it depends on the area you live in, how much contact you still have with JW friends and family and probably how prominent you initially were in the congergation. My sister-in-law hadn't been to meetings in three years, got called to a judicial meeting in another city, tried and d/fed by people who had never even met her.

Circumstances are different for everyone. I do believe fading is best, but there are no guarentees that they will not come after you. Sorry but them is the facts dude, just because it worked for you doesn't mean it will for everyone.

Trotafox

Edited by - Trotafox on 31 August 2002 23:43:17

Trotafox

Let's try again. That post really got messed up.

Ugg:

with elders that have personalities like serpentsdeadlywith no place to hide.

Neyank:

And Im sure there are cases where the elders feel they MUST find something t df an inactive person.

AGREED. I was gone a year from a congregation when I moved. Should never have gone back but I did like a good lil Dub. The whole pressure mess started all over again with the new congregation. I tried to do a fade but there was no way they would let me . They bugged me to death...phone calls, drop in visits by my over-zealous book study conductor, other sisters. All unannounced, of course. They were fishing for something and couldnt find it so they just pestered me to death. Wrote 'em a letter and told them to bug off (FOR GOOD). And if my friend(?) chose to shun me (which she is), too bad for her. She can be their mental slave. Im outta here cause this is NOT spiritual and most definitely NOT LOVE.

Trot (of the ever so grateful to God to be out class)

Edited by - Trotafox on 31 August 2002 23:46:45

kenpodragon

Farkel

One thing I can agree on, is that the Witnesses change the rules depending on what they want. The thing is though, I did not make a blanket statement, in the comment I mentioned that I know some elders do not agree with this. The thing is, the actual teaching of headquarters was to ignore and leave them alone ... unless they were causing trouble. Like I have said many time, there is always a exception to all things ... but the norm is what I said.

Take Care

Dragon

happy man

Kenpo.

Shamanism, what is it all abaout, some indian witch power religion?

take some wextebels from the dessert and find the real life?

When it comes to dfd, wee have here both sides, some who fade away, some who are dfd, depend of how smart you are, myself not so smart i think, talk widh severla about this UN , thing, and even abuse case, perhaps I must try to bee quiet, not so easy is it.

Well now i must go to the sunday meetings soon, by by.

david_10

I left the Organization some 15 years ago, and I've never been bothered at all. I did the slow fade, and when I left I had no enemies or problems with any of the brothers. If asked why I was "discouraged", I did not confide in anyone-----not even close friends or family members. So....... I've been left alone. However, I can think of at least half-a-dozen others who tried to fade and weren't so lucky. In some cases, even after several years, the elders tracked them down and hounded them until they could disfellowship them. And these were the same elders who chose not to bother me. At least they haven't bothered me so far. Basically, the elders can do anything they want and if you've ever given them a reason, even through the most trivial slight, they can and will come after you. There is no time limit. But, I would also point out that the half-a-dozen that I mentioned are a relatively small percentage compared to the 60 or 70 that I know of who have left and never been bothered.

(((((Marilyn))))) My heart goes out to you, but Prisca is right-----you made a mistake by confiding your honest feelings to the brothers. My advice to anyone who is wanting to leave yet not get disfellowshipped is to KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT. This can't be emphasized enough. Do not say anything that can be carried back to the elders. Things that have been said years ago, even to trusted friends or family members, have a funny way of coming back to haunt you.

As far as suing the bastards is concerned, I don't think that the threat of that will deter too many of them; after all, what with jehovah's holy spirit upon them, their arrogance knows no bounds. Plus, very few of them have any money, and money is the only reason to bring a civil lawsuit and the only way that you can get a lawyer interested. Even if you win, there's nothing to collect. On this note, I might mention that my brother is trying to fade and he is being pestered relentlessly by the elders. They don't like him and he's made a few enemies, you see........Anyway he talked to his lawyer (the best in town), and was told that legal precedent definitely favors the defendants in this situation. He compared the Borg to a private club that sets its own rules for membership and the members either accept the rules, or they can leave and suffer the formal consequences. To make the short story even shorter........the lawyer would not accept it on the contingency plan; my brother would have to pay for it out of his own pocket. He was advised to forget it and get on with his life.

Be careful out there, everyone. It's a jungle.

David

teejay

... we were called and told that a judicial committe (sp?) was to be formed to discuss
whether we were apostate. The committee was made up of two local elders and a
visiting elder from another State in Australia. He was like a Nazi and he didn't like us
much because we'd been close friends with his daughter in law whom he didn't like much
either.
I know you mean well, but many many people have not been treated as you suggest we
should have been treated. It's all very well to have rules but there is an extremely wide
application of them and it can so often depend on how small minded and ignorant the
local elders are.

Marilyn,

I'm having a pretty good weekend but this post of yours made me very angry. That you and so many others have been so abused by a hardass and have suffered so much from your family as a result makes my blood boil.

I think that if such a thing ever happened to me, I would threaten the Nazi with a personal lawsuit--let him know that I was coming after him PERSONALLY. I would start by showing the prick where he was violating "what is written" in the Corporation's own material for handling fade-aways. I would remind him that when push came to shove, his 'mother' would cut him loose and he'd be left to fend for himself and that is something I would hope for.

I would let him know that it was henceforth my lifelong mission to totally wreck him financially -- take everything he owned and seek to put him and his family on the street. After that, I wouldn't give a damn what happened to him. I would make him understand that he wouldn't be able to hide behind a corporation but that he'd have a serious PERSONAL price to pay for f****** with me.

Sorry for the rant. Your post got to me.

Why do elders not disfellowship inactive people?

Share this