I went in Field Service (TM) this morning! (page 2)

Liberated

I e-mailed it out before I was even half-way through!!!

I never stopped laughing.....poor buggers.

Libby

Scully

Quotes:

Sounds like you enjoyed your Sacred Service(TM). I certainly feel Encouraged(TM) by your Experience(TM).

Word on the street has it that with so many Tim Horton's operating with Drive-Thru windows these days, the need for a real Coffee Break(TM) is dwindling. If you pick up coffee at the Drive Thru and start going to Return Visits(TM) you get your break AND you can finish your time sooner and get home sooner.

Although it does mean that your Informal Witnessing(TM) at the coffee shops and the Placements(TM) of a few Back Issues(TM) of the magazines is somewhat compromised.

It would have been funny to have a camera with a zoom lens to take pictures of the morning's activities. If anyone inquired about it, you can say you're taking photographs for an exposee of the WTS's policy of allowing pedophiles to go door-to-door.

Love, Scully

freeman

Wonderful Post, LMAO as I read it!

Thank you for taking us along on your outing, I for one really felt I was along for the ride. A waste of a Saturday morning? I dont see it that way at all, you performed a valuable service by reminding all of us just how pathetic the Witness life is. And if by chance someone should be lurking and reads your post, you never know they may just see themselves being described here and have a revelation.

Thanks again.

Freeman

Quotes

Scully said:

It would have been funny to have a camera with a zoom lens to take pictures of the morning's activities.

I was thinking about it. Actually, I took a 35MM with me, with a huge telephoto lens. I knew that I was a safe distance and could have used it from within the car, but I was afraid that the Householders(TM) close to my car would have Grown Faint Out Of Fear(TM) and called the police if they saw a mysterious dark sedan with someone taking obvous spy pics.

This just may give me the opportunity to buy that miniature telephoto video camea I've always wanted. hhhhhmmmmmm.....

Edited by - Quotes on 1 September 2002 9:23:41

peterstride

Loved your post Quotes!

I forgot how ssssssslllloowly we used to walk when we were out in service...or how lightly we would knock on the doors, even though there was a doorbell on most of them. Even as faithfull...sorry, fanatic JWs, most of the people I knew (including myself) didn't want to do or feel comfortable doing door to door work...

As for the digital camera thing, I have just the unit you might want to use....hee hee

Cheers,

Peter Stride
Toronto, Canada

The Alchemist

Sounds like an efficent service group to me. At least they didn't do the "criss-cross territory RV routeen" TM our group was famous for. We're talking 30 miles each way. 1 call all morning if you were lucky..I mean fortunate. Dave

Edited by - The Alchemist on 1 September 2002 10:44:11

SYN

Quotes: You definitely get the award for most (TM) addendums ever! Damn! What a hilarious post! Keep on rocking! Hell, when I was doing Field Service (TM) during my Salad Days (TM), we Dubs even called it the Pioneer Lurch! I think those Pioneers actually got it down to a science, the art of walking without actually moving much!

Xena

Hey I thought it was called the "Pioneer Shuffle"?

Enjoyed spending Sat. morning with you Quotes! to freaking funny dude!!!

I am with T.A. though we used to try and spread out RV's out a bit more...and rural...oh yea baby you could really milk the time then!!!!

Stephanus

I've always wanted to do this, using my digtal camera to record the event. Not having a car doesn't make it easy. The Dubs don't even come to my door anymore, so my plan of getting a snapshot of them on my doorstep won't see fruition either. My camera battery is on the fritz, so until I get a new one, I can't implement any more subtle plans. One of which involves me going for a walk around my section of town every half hour on Saturday mornings, in the hope that I will run into them doing our neighbourhood.

Brother Quotes, please get a digital camera so you can hand in a proper record of your field service!

Farkel

Quotes,

Good stuff. Yep that sums up the way it was when I was a dub decades ago. Except we called it the "Pioneer Shuffle." "Dub Dwaddle" is another good one!

: I noticed that Bro. Purple-Shirt he had an accessory on the rear bumper: a small chrome propeller which would spin in the wind while the vehicle was in motion.

I hope the hell he has a signed-in-triplicate "Theocratically Approved(tm)" document in his possession, or he could be headed for trouble! I'm sure the society could find a pagan origin for chrome propellers, and if they haven't, they will.

When I was a dub, anything but pure white dress shirts were verboten. Striped shirt? "You lose your privileges." Colored shirt? "You lose your privileges." Double-breasted suit? "You lose your privileges." No-cuff dress pants? "You lose your privileges." Side-burns? "You lose your privileges." Modest moustache? "You lose your privileges." Hair barely touching your shirt collar? "You lose your privileges." Skirt that shows your kneebone?" Jane, you SLUT!"

Of course, this is all definitely "Bible-Based(tm)," and does not "go beyond what is written(tm)."

Farkel(tm)
Trademark Class(tm)

I went in Field Service (TM) this morning!

Share this