Hi there,
I'm not sure whether you are going to come back and read any of these posts, my advise to you is......
READ YOUR BIBLE AND PRAY TO GOD SILENTLY THIS WILL HELP AS HE WILL GIVE YOU THE HOLY SPIRIT TO DISCERN WISELY WHAT IS WRITTEN IN THE BIBLE. PLEASE DO THIS WITHOUT ALL THE OTHER LITERATURE YOU ARE GIVEN.
I was a witness for 30 years and I have done this and it's like I had been reading another book, please DO NOT get baptised until you know everything.
Also I am learning that we will never be acceptable to God if he is looking at us based on works. He sent his son to all sinners, the first person he spoke to in his ministry was a woman who was a fornicator.
He said if you believe in me you will be saved. Not you must preach for 10 hours a month and goto 5 meetings a week.
Do you really realise what an apostate is? It is someone who denies Christ, not someone who doesn't do as JWs tell you to.
Anyway please stay and enjoy real loving companionship here at this site, we do really CARE.
Luv
Tish