Upcoming Holidays- Celebrating in Secret

by Vitameatavegamin 23 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Vitameatavegamin

  I know, I should not be such a coward. As they say, grow some balls!!

  I am a female by the way, balls are not in the cards.
• 

  ISP

  Will be doing Christmas.......but have to take some anti-detection measures........

  ISP
• 

  nilfun

  I never really felt drawn to Thanksgiving.
  All those scenes of Pilgrims and Indians in the
  "New World" (it wasn't "new" to the Indians) smiling
  at each other across a table overflowing with roast turkeys,
  ears of corn, pumpkin pie, and baskets of plenty always reminded
  me of the artwork depicting the Society's vision of their "New World".

  Fake.

  I believe that what I was taught in grade school
  about American history was not just about illuminating
  the past. It was also about attempting to teach me blind nationalism.

  A whitewash.

  I realize that it's simply a day set aside for a
  nation to give thanks, but for me it is also about glossing
  over the beginnings of a very traumatic time (to say the least) for the
  aboriginal people of the Americas.

  Maybe if I had been brought up to celebrate
  Thanksgiving, and carried with me all the memories of
  family and friends coming together to give thanks, it might be
  easier for me to ignore the real history behind the all those pictures
  of smiling Indian and Pilgrim faces tacked up on the walls in the school
  corridors, and just celebrate the day as a time to give thanks.

  But I wasn't. And I can't make it mean something to me
  that it doesn't. It just doesnt resonate with me.

  I dont think there is anything wrong with celebrating Thanksgiving.
  I just cant bring myself to do it.

  (I hope that this does not come across as judgmental.
  If it does, it is only due to my clumsiness as a writer. )
• 

  Dawn

  I wanted to celebrate soooo bad - was raised a JW and never got to participate. But I was afriad of the backlash from my parents even after I was DF'd.

  When I met my husband I blamed it on him.....he's worldy you know (ha ha ha).

  It's been a number of years now and my mom's gotten over it. She even calls to see how the kids enjoyed their holidays and what they got for Christmas. Last year she came over and complimented me on the decorations and the tree. I think that deep down she wishes she could still celebrate - I know she had a lot of happy memories surrounding the holidays.
• 

  cruzanheart

  I've always looked on Thanksgiving this way:

  1. Free turkeys at most supermarkets (can't pass that one up!);

  2. Four-day weekend, which makes it a heck of a lot easier to plan and execute a dinner party;

  3. Everybody's off and most of my friends don't travel out of town that weekend (except for us one memorable Thanksgiving where I had this brilliant idea to fly space available to England on the grounds that it wouldn't be crowded since they don't celebrate the holiday - I think I'll start a thread on travel disasters and see what kind of response we get!);

  4. Nonstop football all day;

  5. Free turkeys.
• 

  Swan

  Dear Vita,

  We actually discussed this subject at the xJW Meetup tonight. Someone mentioned that they put up all sorts of decorations because to not do so was to admit that the JWs were still in control. I thought that was a good point, so I thought I would share it. Of course, you have to balance that with what you are risking. Good luck to you whatever your decision.

  Tammy

  P.S. Or you could just claim you were confused because the UN has Christmas lights and Trick-or-Treat for Unicef and you heard that the JWs had joined the UN. Or you could say, oh, I thought that we could celebrate in bits and pieces, but not as a whole, like blood transfusions. Or, how about, I thought It was okay after the end of the 20th century. Or spell out the number 1914 in lights so you can say you were just getting your time in.
• 

  Granny Linda

  Although I do not "believe" in the reason for Christmas...it's one of my favorite holidays. How can ya just not love all the lights and wonderful decorations, eh. Any holiday is a great time for sharing...and hubby and I, usually at Thanksgiving, invite those who are alone for whatever reason. Christmas is reserved for the grandchildren.

  At any rate do enjoy the holiday season...and try your best not to invite guilt. It just isn't worth the mental anguish one might experience whilst simply attempting to enjoy life. That's a foreign word to Jw's - enjoyment for enjoyment sake.

  Happy Holidays!!!!!!! Done any Christmas shopping yet?

  Swan; I got a good chuckle from your post.
• 

  Dia

  It's so sad when we all know that it is very common for JWs to actually 'get their share' by 'just having a little turkey dinner' - but not exactly on that day or 'just buying a little present' - but not exactly on that day, ot not exactly wrapped in THAT paper or THOSE colors etc., etc., etc.

  My JW sends me birthday cards and she scratches out the 'happy birthday' line. Like there aren't a thousand other cards she could send? I guess she's killing two birds with one stone by making an obvious point of preaching and condemning my birthday while at the same time 'honoring' me (in her mind) for it.

  To be in fear of hypocrites....What's the point?

  I'm wondering....is there any reason they have to be invited into your home during the holidays? Can't you just say you're busy?

  They may actually appreciate not being put into a situation that forces them to confront their 'beliefs' face to face.

  I didn't catch whether or not you have children (sorry, can't go back and peek while I'm typing). If you do, at some point, it's going to be important to take a stand on one side or the other.

  But if your kids are really young, there's no point in getting them sucked into debates they're too young to comprehend. (Tho JWs would readily take full advantage of that situation and of their innocence if they're allowed to).

  Best wishes in whatever you choose to do.

  Do what YOU want, on YOUR time schedule.

  I think, when dealing with JWs it's wise to heed the biblical advice to be 'cunning as wolves'.
• 

  Swan

  Granny Linda;

  I'm glad I made you laugh! I find humor is a very good thing when you are dealing with the realities of life as a former JW.

  Tammy
• 

  stichione

  Although I am still a JW, I will be secretly celebrating my son's 8th birthday this month. I won't even tell my wife I'm doing it, I'll just take the little fellow out and spend an afternoon with him(lunch at McDonald's, park, a Nintendo game etc.) and remind him I'm doing it specifically because its HIS birthday!