I also grew up in the "truth" - I have recently found my truth and I thank God for it every day.
I recommend that you research, study, probe and research some more. Visit other churches, see what else is out there.
A religion shouldn't control every single aspect of your life.
A true relationship with God has nothing to do with religion.
Good luck on your journey, I hope that you are able to find what I have found. :)