For those of you who have left the JW and have had your friends? shun you. How did you feel when some of the friends that shunned you also left the JW and contacted you wanting to still be friends? Did you find it hard resuming a relationship with them? Were you able to "forgive them" for treating you cruelly? Or did you consider other people that befriended you (worldly people such as I) and loved you for yourself (ex-JW or whatever) your true friends? Or do you have mixed emotions?
How do you deal with dub friends?
by In_between_days 13 Replies latest jw friends
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Satanus
Trying to help a dub is like trying to help an alchoholic, coke head, or a codependent. It's pretty hopeless. They have to reach a very low point, where their denial is broken. Once they start to admit to themselves what is going on with themselves, then something can be done. I have had a bit of experience with trying to help all of the above types of people.
Btw, i have no dub friends. When i found out the wt was false, i shared some of those things with my dub friends at the time, for a period of a yr. After a yr, i was dfd. Poof, friends not friends anymore. Family not family anymore.
SS
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In_between_days
How did you feel when some of the friends that shunned you also left the JW and contacted you wanting to still be friends? Did you find it hard resuming a relationship with them? Were you able to "forgive them" for treating you cruelly?
I would welcome an ex dub who had previously shunned me with open arms, personaly. I only say this because my best friend left the org and I shunned her for over a year. When I then left myself, the first thing I did was call her and she was happy to resume our freindship. I wouldnt have got through it without her, so I would always do the same.
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plmkrzy
I have a few dub friends who I do still consider to be very good friends.
I still have jw friends...we just don't speak to each other anymore. LOL!
But seriously I will be seeing a few of them shortly and when I do we will just talk about neutral things as much a poss. I certainly won't be bringing up the latest thread topics on JWD.com LOL
But they are also hundreds of miles away and we only see each other on rare occasions.
JWs from my home town, I no longer communicate with and most of them do shunn me if there is a 'bumping into'.
At first it was hard to put up with and then there was a period where I was ANGRY! But now I am more comfortable with it. I don't get mad at anyone, but I do feel sorry for them. The ones that practice shunning to such a degree that it is now.
Heck you use to have to show up at a meeting pregnant with a cigg hanging out of your mouth in order to be shunned. Now you can be shunned for raising your hand. LOL well maybe not, but it seems like it sometimes.