The story of the fatal fight in Africa has been told by an old missionary, a real reliable German, I do not know the details.
Did you know??
by fulano 18 Replies latest jw friends
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czarofmischief
a real reliable German? He's a German so he can't lie?
Gawd, this is the funniest thread I've ever seen.
GB: Hey, Jesus.
JC: Ah, shoot. You again. What?
GB: I've got this talk coming up about donations and why we need more.
JC: So? What does that have to do with me?
GB: Can we have a couple squirts? For our suits?
JC: Ah, shoot, man, I'm getting dizzy! Can't you conserve or something? What are you, washing your cars in the stuff?
GB: Um.
JC: You're washing your cars in the stuff, aren't you. I come down there and spill my blood for all mankind and you use it to wash your Olds. Very unkosher. Very, very unkosher.
GB: Well you let us down in 1914...
JC: Don't YOU try to guilt trip ME!
CZAR [of the "frustrated playwright" class]
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blondie
I suppose the GB doesn't want the laundry water for the R&F at Bethel swishing through their clothes. There are individual washers and dryers provided at Bethel for the R&F to use to do their own laundry in case they have similar revulsions.
Blondie
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Vivamus
lol in general and LOL @ Czar
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Surreptitious
We know that the laundry bit must be true because it was published in the Washtower.
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gumby
To be honest folks, I"ll tell you the real reason.
The GB's average age is 85. Can you imagine what the GB's underwear looks like by the end of the day? Would you want to wear a t-shirt that had been washed with 12 old men's underwear??
Good gawd, there would be so many brown spots on your clothes people would call you spot. ..........Oh......not to mention the odor!.......I have to go puke now....I'll see ya.
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Shakita
Sounds like the good ole' boys need some "Oops I Crapped My Pants"
Oops! I Crapped My Pants
Ana.....Ana Gasteyer
Open - porch of nice home, looking out on yard.
[Two grandparents sit with grandchild, as parents approach in tennis uniforms]
Ana: Hey, Mom what do you say to a game of tennis?
Grandchild: Come on grandma, with you on our side, the boys don't stand a chance!
Grandma: Okay, I'll get my racket
[Grandma rises from site but changes her mind, looking concerned]
Grandma: On second thought, I think I better sit this one out.
[Grandma upset, looks up at Grandpa]
Grandpa: You kids go ahead, I wanna have a talk with your old grandma.
[kids, parent leave; Grandpa sits down]
Grandpa: You're still having control problems, aren't you?
Grandma: I just don't feel confident, Harvey.
Grandpa: Come with me. I wanna let you in on a little secret.
[Grandpa takes Grandma's hand and they leave porch]
[Grandpa opens cabinet and takes out adult diapers]
Grandpa: Here we are. Oops! I Crapped My Pants.
Grandma: Oops! I Crapped My Pants. I've heard of those. Do they work?
Grandpa: Oops! I Crapped My Pants outperformed every bladder and bowel control product on the market today. Here, I'll show you.
[Grandma holds open diaper, Grandpa holds pitcher]
Grandpa: Imagine this pitcher of tea is really a gallon of your feces.
[Grandpa pours pitcher of tea with lemons into diaper]
Grandpa: See how its super thick protection allows for maximum absorbency without leaking.
Grandma: I'm impressed. Oops! I Crapped My Pants can hold a lot of dung.
Grandpa: And get this - Oops! I Crapped My Pants are biodegradable. Now that's good for the environment.
Grandma: Hey, how do you know so much about Oops! I Crapped My Pants?
Grandpa: Well I'm wearing them.. and I just did.
[Grandpa and Grandma smile at each other]
[tennis courts, Grandpa and Grandma playing tennis with children]
Grandchild: Nice point, Grandma!
[Grandma turns to address camera]
Grandma: Thanks, Oops! I Crapped My Pants!
Voice-over: Visit your local pharmacy and just say, "Oops! I Crapped My Pants.
[Grandpa hugs Grandma, kisses her on the head. They walk away happy]
[They turn to walk away and their tennis shorts are bulging...]
Thanks to Michelle Donahue Hillison for this transcript!SNL Transcripts -
fulano
To be honest folks, I"ll tell you the real reason.
The GB's average age is 85. Can you imagine what the GB's underwear looks like by the end of the day? Would you want to wear a t-shirt that had been washed with 12 old men's underwear??
Good gawd, there would be so many brown spots on your clothes people would call you spot. ..........Oh......not to mention the odor!.......I have to go puke now....I'll see ya
Sorry but this can't be the reason.I personally know brother Kurzen well, he was 93 at that time and his underwear was treated like everybodies....sorry for the detail.
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ChakkaConned
LOL@ gumby and Surreptitious!
