My JW story

by Aztec 22 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Aztec
    Aztec

    I don't think any of this is really all that unusual so I'm sorry if you find it dull. I was raised in the JW cult from birth, a third generation member to boot. My family was full of elders, ministerial servants and overseers of all sorts. I never felt comfortable in the organization though. I had so many questions that were never answered or were just brushed off with simplistic replies:"Jehovah knows". I also received overzealous corporal punishment on a regular basis. Small things such as voicing my displeasure at my mothers choice of a meal received punches and worse. As unhappy and withdrawn as I was I still strived very hard to be a good Witness. I eventually got baptized and started to pioneer. When I was almost 19 I met a "worldly" guy who I decided immediatly that I liked. I snuck out of my parents house to go on a date with him. The date turned out badly because he took my back to his house and raped me. I won't go into details but it was a very bad experience and destroyed any faith I had in a god. I immediatly stopped pioneering and went on a wild rampage for about 3 years. Noone ever asked my "why" I was acting this way they just tried over and over to get me to go to meetings and study. Then when I was 22 I had a child. Surprise surprise guess who I found myself sitting in front of. That's right a judicial committee! These morbid old men wanted to know every sordid detail of what I had been up to even though I had hardly attended a meeting in 3 years. No offers of sympathy or support of course. I was publicly reproved and everyone knew why. I stopped caring at that point and haven't been back in the 6 years since. My family still tries to get me to go but it's no use because I've had my blinders removed through what I have seen and read. The only thing I can do now is help get my younger siblings out and offer them support. So far that hasn't been a problem and I think that even my mother wants to leave.

    I have to remain somewhat anonymous because I still have some family members who attend but I hope that some of this helps all of you to understand my point of view. Thanks for listening!

    ~Aztec

  • Buster
    Buster

    Welcome!

  • pettygrudger
    pettygrudger

    ((Aztec))

    No, although apparently common, your story is not "boring" - it was your life - the good, the bad & the ugly - life is not boring. The pain of being raped is extremely difficult to live with, regardless of how it occurred.

    Welcome and I look forward to reading your posts!

  • Gopher
    Gopher

    Aztec,

    Welcome to the board and thanks for the backgrounder!! It wasn't boring at all. Posting a short biography adds a little human touch to your board persona.

    Your story about uncaring, procedure-minded elders rings true. But their attitude may have helped speed your exit (mentally) from the Borg.

    Good to have you here.

  • Jesika
    Jesika

    I am so sorry that guy victimized you, how terrible.

    I can relate to everything you have said, and thank you for posting your story.

    Welcome and I look forward to reading more from you.

    Jes

  • ChakkaConned
    ChakkaConned

    Hi Aztec,

    I can relate to much of what you've written. Welcome to the forum You're among friends.

    Chakka

  • shera
    shera

    Welcome,glad you are here.

    Crappy things happen to good people and its not fair,is it? Time heals all..

    Take care

  • musky
    musky

    Welcome Aztec. I hope you will find this forum to be of help to you , and I look forward to reading your posts.

  • A Paduan
    A Paduan

    Good for you - I am so glad for you that you're out.

    All the best with your family - if you need to bounce your ideas, vent or whatever, I'm sure you'll find plenty of ears here - welcome.

    paduan

  • Dia
    Dia

    I'm very sorry that you had to go through the things you did without a family or friends to love and support you and help you find your way.

    Hope you will find those things now. You deserve them.

    How's your baby?

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