people df'd for having sex (page 2)

MrMoe

*sigh* You are where was a while back hun... when I was first with my ex husband (live in BF at the time) and I thought the dubs still had the truth. We got married... then I realized the Dubs (Jw's) were full of horse manure... Then we split... life was still in shambles... Then, I started to heal.

I swear, it gets better. You need to heal, and come to the realization that the JW's are a CULT. Please stick around and if u need to talk e-mail me -- [email protected] You will find this board just may be the therapy you are looking for.

I remember the nights of being with my ex... waking up to nighmere's that Jehovahs was going to kill me at Armageddon. I remember feeling so overwhelmed with guilt for having sex... so many things... so many hang-ups.

There is a lot u need to learn darling, and many of the people here will do thier best to help you.

Love,

Amanda

placebo_apothecary

amanda,

thanx for the help but i dont want to heal , i want things to make sense, and right now they really dont.

LB

You don't want to heal but want things to make sense? Well part of it is going to stop thinking like a JW. That takes awhile. You see the JW's make it seem like everything makes perfect sense. It doesn't. Nothing really does. They just respeat the same old prose over and over so that it seems to make sense.

Talk to some of the women here. Moe has stood in your shoes. I suggest talking to her among some others.

joannadandy

Placebo I was right there with ya, and nodding my head to all the advice you were being given until you said:

thanx for the help but i dont want to heal , i want things to make sense, and right now they really dont.

That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard. Things can never make sense when you are in the mental shambles you are right now. I'm not trying to be hard on you, but please try and listen to what people are telling you. You want advice, yet you don't want to hear it. You just keep repeating yourself and don't seem to be really comprehending what people are trying to tell you here. So why did you even bother to ask? If you want to go back, go back. If you want your life to be your own, stay far away from the jw's. Have an open mind. There are alternatives to the jw mentality that can be more fullfilling.

You're in a bad spot because something you once believed in (your relationship with your boyfriend) is failing, and you don't trust it anymore. You don't know what to trust, so you are falling back on an old belief system. In my opinion you are regressing to what is comfortable for. That's why nothing makes sense. Give yourself some time. But please please! Don't shut off the people here (who you asked for opinions from) and just keep spouting your same opinions. Please read them and really take them to heart. They have given you lots of great information and ideas. If you aren't going to listen to what they have to say, why even bother asking?

I hope you make the right choice for you. But I strongly encourage you to look at other options.

avishai

((((placebo))))). It does get better. Life. Sex. And all of the above. TONS of us know exactly what you are going through. And although I was'nt df'd for sex, it's why I left! Yes, it is worth it. Btw, technically, you CAN"T be df'd for sex, just "attitude". Yeah, right. Try saying your repentant when the elders REALLY want you gone. It aint gonna happen. Stick around, talk to everyone, & most of all, welcome, you are among kindred spirits

DannyBear

LB,

*** You see the JW's make it seem like everything makes perfect sense. It doesn't. Nothing really does***

That was a really important comment for placebo to ponder. Jw's are so emeshed in trying to live up to draconian standards, policies, rules, elder's views, not to mention isolated bible verse and interpretations that change from year to year, that they really never see the obvious. Noone has the answers, noone has the corner on righteousness, no matter how much they lay claim to having it.

Placebo you would do very well to listen to someone like Amanda. Her words ring loud and clear, as someone who just may be of help. Not to mention she just offered you something few (as I can recall) newbies are afforded......an intent listening ear. Maybe you were to cavalier in your dismissal of her offer??? Think?

Danny

heathen

I think I would have lit a ciggarette after the dfing ,just to show the satisfaction lol

SPAZnik

LOL heathen.

SPAZ

outbackaussie

placebo - You sound hurt and stressed right now, I hope you can find a way to make sense of what is/has happening to you. It has been sometime since I was in your position. Things didn't make sense for quite a while after. I even succeeded in getting reinstated because life with the W and my family was miserable and the fear of armageddon was so powerful. But events happened that caused me to doubt my faith and the teachings of the WT. When your whole value system is placed under that pressure life relly stops making sense for a time. I would suggest you spend time to really think about what is important to you, what your hopes are, goals are, dreams etc. What do you like about yourself, what do you want to change? REALLY THINK...not just in JW terms, try defining your OWN terms. Honesty and truth will help build your confidence, esteem and trust back up where once you thought it lost. You can email me if you want to talk more {hugs}

Fe2O3Girl

I assume I was disfellowshipped for fornication; I never met with the elders so I don't know. Of course, there are no rules against hitting your wife, so my ex was OK on that score. It does not really matter why you were disfellowshipped.

Being disfellowshipped was the best thing that could have happened to me. It enabled me to move on. Still, it is a long road from being physically free of the Watchtower to being mentally and spiritually free. This means looking around you with honest eyes, not through Watchtower blinkers.

Understand: The world is no worse in general than it has ever been. The "End" is no closer than it was in 1874, or 1914, or...........

Have you had any councelling since you left the JWs? It could help you.

(((((((((placebo)))))))))) Best wishes to you.

people df'd for having sex

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