What are they saying? Competition.

by dmouse 18 Replies latest jw friends

  • dmouse
    dmouse

    OK, I was having a chuckle to myself this morning looking at this month's pictures on the JW calendar, which depicts the cheesy activities of the elders.

    I was wondering if folks would like to suggest what they are actually saying on this picture:

    My suggestion is:

    Elder - 'So, what don't you understand about the word 'abstain'? It means 'no blood' and if you let your daughter have blood to save her life we'll disfellowship your ass so fast...'

    Mother - 'Thank-you so much, that's really encouraging, we are so glad to have such Godly men looking after our interests'

    Daughter - (thinks) 'Mum, your such an arse-licker, as soon as these idiots are gone I'm gonna get the doctors to get a court order to let me have a transfusion.'

    Edited by - dmouse on 10 December 2002 15:35:33

  • hippikon
    hippikon

    Elder: My dong is this big

  • WingCommander
    WingCommander

    Elder - "Damn, this teen girl is fine. I can't wait for the mother to leave the room so I can hop on top and have my way with her."

    Mother - "I wonder if I can count this time with my sick daughter on my time slip for this month."

    Girl - "I hope I die, please let me die. I'll never be GOOD ENOUGH for a loving JW mate."

    Wing Commander

  • NameWithheld
    NameWithheld
    Elder: My dong is this big

    Girl: Mom is that true? You should know...

  • Elsewhere
    Elsewhere
    So you see... for us to fully understand the extent of her sinning, all of the elders had to run a train on her while she described her naughty thoughts to us.
  • Simon
    Simon

    Mother: You show me from the bible where it says that he can't still be a ministerial servant after the operation!!

  • BeelzeDub
    BeelzeDub

    Mother - "Thank you brothers soooo much for coming, we needed someone to tell us what blood fractions are okay and which ones are not... this is so confusing."

    Black Bro - "You see obstaining from blood, not only keeps the congragation clean but it will also prevent your daughter from becoming a lesbian or drug adict."

    White Bro - "It's in here some where.... oh here it is, since the blood of cows were used in sacrafice to Jehovah in the days of Isreal it is okay to take a transfusion of cow blood in a greater fullfillment of our day"

    Girl thinking - "Did you hear that mom? I am finally going to die for Jehovah. I wonder if I will get my picture in the Awake and a story written about me?"

  • roybatty
    roybatty

    Mother: "Thank you for coming brothers. My daughter is dying and the doctos are pressuring me to allow her to have a blood transfusion and..

    Brother No.1: "Actually, we stopped by because we need time slips from last month for both of you."

    Brother No.2: "Yes, the CO will be here next month and according to my list here, we are missing your time."

    Mother: "Oh, how loving of you brothers to stop by to collect our time (sniffle) even though my daughter has massive internal bleeding and will probably die without a blood transfusion. You men are a blessing from Jehovah."

    Brother No.1: "Just doing our jobs."

    Brother No.2: "Hey, little sister, are you going to eat that fruit dessert?"

    Edited by - roybatty on 10 December 2002 16:15:23

  • riz
    riz

    lol good one roybatty

  • expatbrit
    expatbrit

    Elder: "If he put it in this far it's definitely porneia."

    Expatbrit

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