Would You, Could You, Marry Your Wife Again?

by Englishman 30 Replies latest jw friends

  • Englishman
    Englishman

    A couple of years back, 2 friends of ours decided that they would like to have their marriage vows renewed in our local church. The main reason behind this was that they had married abroad some years back, and they thought that a sort of "second wedding" would be a nice thing for the Mums and Dads who had missed out on the original. It was fine, very enjoyable.

    Hmm, I got to thinking, Her Ladyship and I did not marry in church, but settled for a Registry Office bash because of parental JW pressure, and also, because I had been married before it was, back then, very difficult to obtain a Church wedding if one had been divorced.

    So, I thought, why don't we do the same thing on our 30th anniversary next year as our 2 friends did and have another marriage ceremony? In a nice big Church with a basey organ and bells? Invite everyone, lots of music and dancing, a real celebration!

    I put the idea to Her Ladyship, and, to my surprise, she is not at all keen on the idea. She says, that in her opinion, people only opt for a re-affirmation of their marriage vows when they have broken the first lot of vows, and folks who go in for this sort of thing do it as a sort of last resort when their marriage is on the rocks.

    Now this took me back considerably. However, she then cited the cases of 3 of her friends who did this, and all the marriages failed shortly afterwards. She said that although it was a nice idea, engaging in such a ceremony would send out the wrong message to all of our friends and family.

    So there you go. I guess she has a point. Is she right, I wonder? Does a re-affirmation of marriage vows send out a clear signal that all is not well?

    Englishman.

  • Joyzabel
    Joyzabel

    The thought is lovely that you care so much for your mate that you want everyone to know, but I would tend to agree with HL, E-man. Arent the original vows good enough?

    She had some good examples of why not and I always wonder why people renew their vows unless they were broken and feel the need to recommit to their lifes partner.

    Just my 2 cents.

    j2bf

    ps, we can throw you a wedding/renew vows on the beach next spring! Tell her to bring her dress. No shoes allowed. You can just wear your pub shirt. Casual is the rule on the beach.

  • Simon
    Simon

    What?! Relive the worst erm ... I mean the 'happiest' day of my life? ... with the woman I love? ... but what would my wife say?!

    Seriously, I can see why some people would do it - I'd like a set of wedding photo's without our JDumb family in it, many of who are now shunning us (I suppose I could photoshop them out though)

    Personally, I found the day an ordeal 'cause being the centre of attention is the one thing I hate. Oh, and they made me dance!!

    Edited by - Simon on 17 December 2002 14:58:25

  • SpannerintheWorks
    SpannerintheWorks

    E-man,

    I put the idea to Her Ladyship, and, to my surprise, she is not at all keen on the idea. She says, that in her opinion, people only opt for a re-affirmation of their marriage vows when they have broken the first lot of vows, and folks who go in for this sort of thing do it as a sort of last resort when their marriage is on the rocks.

    I am not quite as "worldly" as you , but I would go along with HL; she has a point!

    Bury it, E-man!

    Spanner

  • WildTurkey
    WildTurkey

    I would like to marry Dede again, but Im afraid to ask her. She may say no.

    E-man sounds like a great idea.

  • Joyzabel
    Joyzabel

    LOL @ WT, you better be afraid!!!

    Edited by - joy2bfree on 17 December 2002 15:21:15

  • YERU2
    YERU2

    In a word? Hell no! Oh, that was two words, shit!

  • ashitaka
    ashitaka

    When my wife and I are rich, sure. We got married at a justice of the peace to avoid her evil JW parents, and it would be nice to have a more formal wedding, less the pressure.

    ash

  • freedom96
    freedom96

    I have never heard that when people renew their vows it is because something happened to suggest the need to renew them. I always thought of it as a romantic time to share with many who may not have been there the first time, like with the children.

    As for my wife, I would marry her again in a heartbeat.

  • Skeptic
    Skeptic
    So there you go. I guess she has a point. Is she right, I wonder? Does a re-affirmation of marriage vows send out a clear signal that all is not well?

    My first soul mate re-affirmed her marriage vows with her hubby. They did not have a good marriage. They were two very nice people who simply did not love each other.

    That said, re-affirming marriage vows is a tradition in the Catholic Church. It is done after a certain number of years of marriage. I think it is a beautiful tradition, and can be a sign of great love for each other.

    Richard

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