Funniest/Most outrageous/Most Shocking/ thing...

Happy

I was just wondering what was the most astounding thing you guys have had a JW say to you. Whether it was while you were still in the borg or after you left. I've heard some rather funny stories on this subject.

Been there

I think the funniest thing a witness said to me...........Had to have been the time my aunt who was drunk as a skunk, telling me I should stop smoking because God doesn't like it. Sorry but something just didn't seem right with that picture.

Aztec

"I swear I saw a smurf get up and bite a baby"...LOL

"KISS stands for knights in satan's service"

""Another One Bites the Dust" by Queen has satanic messages when played backwards"

Oh man did I have a wonderful childhood!

~Aztec

Nickey

The Dramas always got a laugh out of me. Kind of like a Mime, they'd pretend to talk while the tape played.

I heard about the Smurf. What is up with the smurf?

czarofmischief

The little blue men in white hats are obviously Hollywood's attempt to seduce the youth of Jehovah into demon worship, witht heir heathen chant of "la la la" and their MAGIC! There is no record of the ancient Israelites watching the smurfs or attending Smurfs on Ice, so why should true Christians today choose to partake of the table of demons?

The most outrageous thing I've ever heard was when the CO accused Star Trek of promoting bestiality - because of Kirk's proclivities with alien women.

CZAR

Happy

Man oh man, I could listen to those stories all day, especially the ones about the smurfs, because I've heard it in like 40 different places, and it's STILL hilarious. I mean really, how can a person not think the GB is a bunch of crackpots when they preach about the evils of smurfs. Just too funny.

Mac

An elder at my hall, upon observing a couple of young brothers engaged in a little horse play before the meeting (They were flicking each other), dragged them into the library and lectured them on the dangers of such physical contact leading to homosexuality!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Scary stuff, kiddies!

mac

Marcos

My best friend and another mutual friend were in a meeting with Max Larson (then the factory overseer in Brooklyn) back in 19 and 73. I was already discharged the year before after having put in my 4 years. I left voluntarily and with great joy. Anyway these two brothers were in trouble for having returned a week late from their vacation. We had all crossed the country by car and had a lot of great adventures on the way.

We had returned to Brooklyn and entered Bethel that day, uninvited, to have lunch and raise a little hell. I had been gone for a year but when we went down to one of the dining rooms to eat, one of the table heads asked ME if the other 3 or 4 guys were with me (seems he recognized me but not the others). I assured him that everything was "cool" and that they were my guests. I still get a kick out of that.

My buddy was roomng in the Squibb building and we had gone in that morning to start packing his stuff. He had put in 3 years but was being asked to leave for returning a week late. In came the "House Servant" for that building to raise a fuss. We made fun of him and told him to get out. He left in a snit. I mentioned to him that he should not let the door hit him in the ass on his way out.

Anyway, my buddy and our mutual friend had already been invited to Max Larson's office to "discuss" their bad attitudes. That meeting concluded with (I think) one of Larson's henchmen saying, "If we were still living under Jewish law, we MIGHT have to stone you." My buddy responded by saying; "Well then, it's good that we no longer live under that law then, isn't it?"

We all spent another week in New York City. Bethel obviously knew where we were and kept calling trying to get us all to come in for another inquisition. We just laughed.

All it ever got us was public reproof when we returned to the West Coast. Well, I was told that this was announced in every congregation that we had ever attended. In my case, all over the US.

Ahhhh, the good ol' days!

Marcos

Edited by - marcos on 25 December 2002 23:13:42

LB

I'd say one of the most outrageous things said to me was not long after my mother died. A pioneer sister told me I'd better get ontrack with the truth because she didn't want to have to be the one to tell my mother why I wasn't around to greet her when she was resurrected.

I told her that she had placed herself in grave danger as she had judged me not worthy and herself worthy, a job that wasn't hers. Her and the other two pioneer sisters just sort of huffed a bit and took their leave.

OrbitingTheSun

LB, that has to be one of the most despicable things I have heard...although it does not surprise me. How did you have the composure to respond so gently??

Funniest/Most outrageous/Most Shocking/ thing...

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