Getting the Urge!

by Theburstbubble 23 Replies latest jw friends

  • Theburstbubble
    Theburstbubble

    Evening folks, so as some of you may know we have recently decided to leave the witnesses and can see it for the man made organisation it is.

    So, why do I get the urge to go back and feel guilty for not being there! It's like my mind is telling me to be logical about it all but then something keeps pulling me back.

    Don't get me wrong I really want to break free from it all and I'm resisting the urge to go back as I have been miserable in the truth for a long time as I've known it's not right and want to do the best by my daughter.

    Has anyone else feel the same when they left?

  • wisdomfrombelow
    wisdomfrombelow
    Everyone has the fear of the unknown. If you were a born-in then that is all you know and the outside world can be scary. I don't know how old your daughter is but giving her better more positive world view will be important in the choices she makes. Just find something to do on the midweek meeting night and the Sunday morning meeting time and soon it gets easier the more meetings you miss until you don't miss them anymore.
  • Theburstbubble
    Theburstbubble
    Thanks Wisdomfrombelow. My daughter is 3 years old and she became the game changer for me. I've been raised a JW from birth so I think my brain is still partly engaged into the JW thinking. I guess it takes time but I was hoping to feel relieved and happy. not looking over my shoulder with rosy coloured spectacles.
  • GodZoo
    GodZoo

    That urge will wane the longer you stay away, disconnect, cut all the many strings both social, psychological, intellectual and emotional and continue to learn the tatt.. however that little tug in the mind can last your entire life..

    Mine did for over 30 years because I did not have the right information or a real overview of the organisation, what it really is and how it operates with it's deep brain washing techniques. Accurate knowledge and getting to really see 'behind the curtain' helps profoundly in the liberating/deprogramming process and can speed things up massively.

  • Village Idiot
    Village Idiot
    My advise is to read the "apostate" literature such as Raymond Franz Crisis of Conscience and In Search of Christian Freedom (available free in PDF). After doing that you'll likely have less and less desire to go back.
  • OrphanCrow
    OrphanCrow
    Theburstbubble: So, why do I get the urge to go back and feel guilty for not being there! It's like my mind is telling me to be logical about it all but then something keeps pulling me back.

    Burstbubble, I think you are probably feeling the effects of "comfort zone".

    When we move into new environments, even when that new place is a better place to be, our conditioned pysche is uncomfortable and we often respond with the urge to seek out what is the most familiar, not neccessarily that which is the best.

    It's okay...you just have to give yourself time to adjust to your new surroundings. Pretty soon, that old comfort zone will be replaced with the new and better comfort zone. Give yourself time and make yourself familar with your new world.

    Take Wisdom's advice and plan fun events exactly at the time that meetings are scheduled. Go to the zoo or watch a movie or bake cookies....

    Good luck.

  • Londo111
    Londo111
    Read: Combatting Cult Mind Control.
  • Dumplin
    Dumplin
    come on... you don't want to be a pedophile apologist ALL your life, do you? Get out of her, my people!
  • Dumplin
    Dumplin
    Think of the pain and misery these people have inflicted on others and you'll make the right decision.
  • Dumplin
    Dumplin

    If you count up those who died during the vaccination ban, died during the organ transplant ban, during the blood ban. Then those of Malawi, and the Nazi camps. Then the suicides, because of shunning.
    It’s way more than Jim Jones and the People’s Temple. More than People’s Temple, Heaven’s Gate, Branch Davidians (Waco) combined.
    I think there will come a point where it will be recognized as one of the deadliest cults.

    I personally don't want any part of sharing in her sins.

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