What went wrong in your congregation? (page 2)

silvia

I admit to being a potential convert. The members whether they realize it or not have pretty much scared me away. Every time that I visited the hall, I would hear about not associating with worldly people that you are not to be their friend. I wanted to signal or raise my hand and say,"Hey, you know. I'm sitting right here. Maybe you should keep this kind of talk for another time". (Like, when worldly people aren't in the audience). Made me feel like a complete outsider. Another beef that I had with the hall was local needs night. A total gossip passive aggressive session for all to enjoy. (sarcasm), I admit to enjoying the the study articles. The only reason why I would attend, It seems to me that the members don't want outsiders to join.

OneEyedJoe

I admit to being a potential convert. The members whether they realize it or not have pretty much scared me away. Every time that I visited the hall, I would hear about not associating with worldly people that you are not to be their friend. I wanted to signal or raise my hand and say,"Hey, you know. I'm sitting right here. Maybe you should keep this kind of talk for another time". (Like, when worldly people aren't in the audience). Made me feel like a complete outsider. Another beef that I had with the hall was local needs night. A total gossip passive aggressive session for all to enjoy. (sarcasm), I admit to enjoying the the study articles. The only reason why I would attend, It seems to me that the members don't want outsiders to join.

Yeah, when I was in I always thought it was odd that we were trying to recruit new people and always encouraged to get them to come to meetings, but then in the meetings half of what went on was just badmouthing the people we're trying to convert or badmouthing their religions. Even on Sundays during the public talk. I would think to myself "they should at least save this stuff for tuesdays where it's less likely that potential converts will be there" and when I realized I was advocating deceptive recruiting tactics it made me suddenly uncomfortable. After that I started to notice many of the existing deceptive tactics that were already institutionalized, and that made me even more uncomfortable...

Edit:

Welcome to the site, Silvia! I hope you find it as useful as I have.

LisaRose

Most JWs only go door to door because they have to, not because they want to, they don't enjoy it, and are not good at it.

Door to door sales is very difficult in general. People are either not at home or are very busy and are suspicious of anyone coming to their door.

Most people either have a religion that works for them or are not interested in any religion.

Most people do not know what Jehovah's witnesses teach, and nothing people usually say at the door informs them. Most people think of them as magazine salesmen.

If people do know anything about Jehovah's Witnesses, it's that they don't celebrate birthdays and holidays and attend hours of meetings every week and have to go door to door every Saturday. Who wants to sign up for that?

Promises of a paradise earth seem unrealistic, the illustrations in the magazine of children petting lions seem corny.

If anyone is taken in by the sappy illustrations of shiny happy people, they soon learn that this paradise comes at the cost of the violent death of most of the earths population, which is not an appealing message.

The internet makes it very difficult for the Watchtower to hide their history of bad date predictions, problems with child sex abuse, and abusive shunning policies.

Je.suis.oisif

Not thread crashing OP. Just want to welcome silvia. Hi

Vidiot

silvia - "I wanted to signal or raise my hand and say,'Hey, you know. I'm sitting right here. Maybe you should keep this kind of talk for another time'."

Priceless.

I lost count of how many times I thought that, when I was still in.

You have to admit, though, it's a pretty effective way of keeping any non-JWs with a smidge of self-esteem and half a brain from wanting to join.

silvia - "It seems to me that the members don't want outsiders to join."

I came to suspect this long ago, and what's more, I think it's one of the reasons the WTS deliberately mandated door-to-door work for as long as did, despite the fact that it's demonstrably not an effective recruiting technique...

...it gives the membership the impression that they are ensuring their salvation by preaching, yet limits them to doing so in a way that actually keeps recruitment at a trickle (in the developed world), so as to manage and minimize the amount of "worldy" thinking that finds its way in amongst said membership.

DesirousOfChange

Unless a person is a really good "CON", one needs to sincerely believe in what they are selling. JWs used to sincerely believe the message they were "selling". I did. Today, JWs really do not believe the BS they are being told to peddle. Thus at least 50% of their reported time/hours is spent sitting at McDonalds or Starbucks, and most of the balance is spent riding around in a car.

You can see by their lifestyles that they are not really "believers".

Doc

never a jw

Welcome Silvia,

You make a great point. I have been in your shoes many, many times, even in my own house while hosting 20 or 30 JW's. It didn't bother me much, until I discovered that the leaders are full of it and they know it. Not only that, they are willing to use their BS to manipulate, control, enslave, and ultimately ruin many a life.

The internet is their biggest problem. Another problem is the training that JW's get. It's mechanical, staged, no passion, no conviction, no zeal. I don't blame them, too much BS and cult tactics prevent the production of great preachers.

OverlappingGeneralizations

For now I am still in, and I still go out in the ministry. However, it's like DesirousOfChange said- I have to believe in what I am selling to be a good salesman. And I just don't believe it anymore. Like I said in another post, according to our belief structure, I think it's more merciful to leave them ignorant. Why be accountable? Just die ignorant and enjoy your resurrection.

Sure, I can get people to take magazines and stand there and talk about their garden, their car, bring them some soup when they are sick, etc. But I'm not offering studies. I don't want them to join. I am just out enjoying the weather, talking to people, being neighborly. I know 90% of my return visits don't read anything I give them and don't care at all. They are just so desperate for human contact that they will talk to anybody who stops by. So mailmen, pizza delivery boys, meter readers, and the like, you are welcome. I am taking one for the team.

The Rebel

Same great points, and I am beginning to realise the ministry isn't about "love" of neighbour. It's about isolation, and not getting to know anyone that doesn't read society literature and agree with the contents.

How rewarding it is to have awakened, and now I welcome people challenging my views, providing people are able to present their arguments in an intelligent and respectful manor.

Funny now I get the message, forcing viewpoints on other people is insulting, unloving and arrogant.

The Rebel.

Vidiot

LisaRose- "The internet makes it very difficult for the Watchtower to hide their history of bad date predictions, problems with child sex abuse, and abusive shunning policies."

Not to mention their increasingly improbable eschatology.

What went wrong in your congregation?

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