Your LAST door

by RAYZORBLADE 24 Replies latest jw experiences

• 

  slimboyfat

  Funny, I can remember my first door but not my last door, even though it must have been only five years ago or so.
• 

  finallysomepride

  I don't remember my last door, but i do remember my last day, a cold wet november day in 1983, location Avondale, Auckland, New Zealand

  ops wrong year 1981
• 

  RAYZORBLADE

  I knew I had started this thread. Felt good about posting it, because everyone eventually will have a "Last Door".

  Thank you Cofty, Clarity, Slimboyfat and Finallysomepride for your follow-ups.

  It can be different things for different former JW's, but that last door for me was a moment of quiet release. It didn't make it easier AFTER I had done my 'last door', but it was memorable because for several minutes that evening back in November 1983, I didn't feel like a liar.

  Just spoke like a neighbour would to another neighbour. It was such a relief. Interestingly enough, the 'last door' was friendly and receptive, but I could not do my door-to-door speech; dealing with my own personal issues at the time; thinking I was even remotely genuine?
  
  It sort of occured to me: I was looking good to others, fooling them even. But why was it OK to be a quiet hypocrite to Jehovah? Ya know!?

  That woman, wherever she may be ... will be permanently etched in my mind's eye.

  She was a solace without even knowing it.

  Damn glad my knuckles don't ache anymore.
• 

  finally awake

  I remember the last door I personally knocked on. It was a blue house, with a bright blue PT Cruiser parked out front in Grayville, IL. No one answered and I was eternally grateful. The very last time I went out in field service, I didn't personally knock on any doors. I was with Just Ron and our kids and for some reason he drove my car down what cannot be described as a road under any stretch of the imagination. I've seen deer paths that were more driveable. After we got clear of the corn field and back onto what passes for a paved road in this area, my nerves were shot and I never agreed to even "ride along" again.
• 

  Emma

  I don't remember my last door but remember the last two times "out in service" and thinking I couldn't keep going. I'd talked to several really nice people who weren't interested at all but were kind, didn't want to be mean. I realized I just couldn't accept that they'd be destroyed just because they didn't want to listen. There were other things going on in my brain, but this was one of the last nails, so to speak.

  So glad I'm out as are all my kids!