"Webmaster's blues"

Simon

or a lamentable attempt at poetry ...

Oh Lord won't you buy me, a nice T1 line
My download's too big and I don't have the time
And just as it gets to one-hundred percent
The line drops and it sticks and just ninety-nine

Oh Lord won't you buy me some more bandwith please
My server is desperate it's down on it's knees
My users are cryin' "I can't see the page"
And pressing refresh just makes my browser freeze.

Oh Lord won't you buy me some extra disk space
I used to have lot's but it's all gone to waste
On JPEGs and GIFs and some WMVs
And the duplicate accounts logged in my database

Oh lord won't you buy me a banner ad link
My hosting is costing me more than you'd think
I spent my last dollar on something to drink
This 'great idea' site is just making me skint

Oh Lord won't you buy me a new CPU
In fact, not just one - can you make it a few?
My code's slowing down and there's now't I can do
Without faster harware I'll just feel blue

Solace

((((((Simon))))))

Thats pretty clever, you are so talented!

I'll get something out to you as soon as possible.

Im sorry you are having bandwith trouble.

Well Simon, you had me going there for a sec until you mentioned that dreaded North American T1 line. It seems to me that in order for you to get my pity, you should edit your post to the more "correct" E1 line, seeing that you are in the UK. Sorry, I just HAD to comment on that one!

Scully

Simon.... lovely poetry.... I just wish I understood all that techie talk

Tell me... do Canadian video tapes work in your UK video machines?? Or have you got the equipment you need to make it compatible if necessary??

Love, Scully

wednesday

simon,

how funny and u set it to the tune of mersadezbenz, by janis. now i am certain that is spelled wrong, but the spell checker does not work on this forum.