They Were Just Here,, Ugh!

dawn27

Sorry I just need to vent a little bit,, After I became inactive I moved away from my home congregation and town and things were really peaceful for a while. I even thought that I might get to avoid the February/ March elder visits as nobody knows me in my new location. Yesterday, I saw two sisters coming to the door and I didn't answer to hopefully avoid a confrontation. Anyway, I go to leave today and the same two ladies were at my door, saying that they had "heard from my mother that I needed some encouragement". Mind you, my mother lives atleast a few hours away and has never even seen where I live yet because I am "bad association." Remembering back, my mother did call me briefly last week and said that she would come for a visit if I would promise to go to a meeting while she was here- talk about emotional blackmail. I told here that I would be happy to have her come visit but would not promise to go to meeting with her. I guess she didn't like my answer, cuz she called and told them my situation and to come by. I told the sisters that I will not be going back and they didn't look to happy, so I imagine they will probably send the elders next week. Thanks alot mom!! Now they will not leave me in peace until I sign a DA letter. I can't believe that she put me in this position. I was enjoying my anonymity and still had a relationship with most of my family. It's her loss,,, I already told her that if the elders visited me and I told them that I didn't want to be a witness I would be DA'd but she didn't believe me. Well, I guess she just had to find out. Did your family "turn you in" too, when you became inactive? Or, otherwise force a descision? How should I respond to her the next time she calls?

VeniceIT

Tell her you'd luv to chat but you have 'diarrhea'!

That's like the failsafe ailment. You could go to meeting with a headache or the sniffles, even nausea but NO ONE would expect you there with 'diarrhea ' it's the magic ailment!!!!

Ven

shera

I'm getting lost with words with this organization.

Sorry to hear that your mother did this.I'm so glad I am no longer in this crack pot of a religion.

Blueblades

Venice, we once had a brother with a FLATULENCE,problem and I'm not talking about windy or empty in speech.He sat right up front and the next three rows were empty behind him.The speaker asked for a glass of water!!!!!!??????So, Dawn 27,you could use that as an excuse also.

Sangdigger

dawn27, you could always try what i did. It seemed to work for me as far as the local cong. When i was seen at a funeral playing "Christendoms Songs", (by the local P.O), he called me and asked me if i still wanted to be a dub. I told him i would never be a member of an organized man made religion again!! He then asked me if i would write a letter stating this to the cong. I knew what he was up to right away, so i fired back with the response "And what will you do if i write that letter? willl you da of df me? He stammered around and said uh.....well.....yes. Then i fired again and asked him, "What is the point of having me disasociate myself, when im not associating with any of the dubs anymore? After a long pause, he drew his breath and said, well i guess thats true, i see your point. ANd so far, i havent been hassled at all. (exept for my family, who has banished me forever) But as far as i know, i have no label on me, and the only reason my family has cut me off, is because of some conversations with my brother and dad and mother on the bible.

Hope this helps. Sorry for your trouble. Seems to go with the territory.

confuzcious

ven,

you are hillarious!!!!!!!

Mary

You're under no obligation to answer your door when/if the elders come a-knocking, so always check to see who it is first. And secondly, if you don't want to be DA'd or DF'd, then DON'T give them any ammo at all. Don't tell them how you feel or anything. And I think I'd be phoning your mom up and blast her for trying to pull such a stupid stunt.......

Carmel

Dawn,

think about it. What your religious beliefs are, are purely your business and no one has the right to ask you what religion you are or if you still "love the organization". You are a free agent and if asked tell them when you want them to know your beliefs, you'll call them. Until then it is none of their business. If necessary repeat it as often as they ask another prying question. Even write it on a card "my beliefs are my own business" Unsigned!

carmel

Scout

Hi Dawn,

Yes, I can sympathize with you. I am one who "faded away" several years ago. Even though I am not da'd or df'd - nor do I associate with or consider myself a JW - my family is shunning me.

The only one who keeps in touch is my sister-in-law. She phoned me recently to give me the "heads up". They (my family of origin) are sure that the only way I will return is if I am officially df'd or made to da myself. So, my brother has a plan to phone me - ask me "trick" questions - and either tape record me or have "two or three witnesses" listening on the other line.

What a bunch of crazy people! They are the epitome of evil. So much for true love and kindness.

This just proves even further to me that I made the right decision. They may be a religious bunch but they sure aren't showing any spirituality.

Since I have left the religion, and in turn my family of origin left me, I have been the healthiest and happiest I have ever been.

Dawn - I wish the same to you. May you continue to find your own path.

Scout

Mum

Hi, Dawn. First and foremost, welcome to the forum.

I'm sorry your mother has betrayed you this way. If it helps, just remind yourself that she does not see it as betrayal and is not allowed to be in touch with her own conscience and natural maternal instinct ("natural affection"). Thanks for sharing that story; it reminds the rest of us of just how lucky we are if we have any family members who respect our privacy in any way.

If you want to maintain contact with your mother, maybe you should rent a post office box or give the address of a friend who will receive mail for you. This friend would have to be a good friend indeed because the JW's would come knocking at her/his door, too.

Scout: Welcome to you as well. I'm sorry you've lost your family but happy that you're doing so well in spite of it. Did you choose your name from the character in To Kill a Mockingbird? Scout is one of my favorite characters in fiction.

Creating my own support network and moving on,

SandraC

They Were Just Here,, Ugh!

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