A truly free mind is a wonderful thing and I too have recently began the journey to that place. Search for it and when you find it, never let anybody ever take it from you again. This life is entirely what you make out of it with your own thoughts and actions conjured up by your own desires and curiosities...feel free to explore.
Welcome. I know what you mean about being shocked,and violated. Especially since they claim to be so Godlike. I hope you will find peace with yourself as I have just recently found myself.
As you can see........there are many of us. Some are still going through the shock, sorrow.......some have just begun.....and some are nearly beyond. Just depends.
But ya got good company here, kid. Welcome & learn. Chatting's nice too.
Because there are so many new ones here, I am wondering if the replies I got to my second post here would assist any who are feeling the way I felt when I first signed in here. An overwhelming pain and confusion.
If you are new, and have just recently uncovered the "truth about the truth", you are not alone. Many others here have felt the same way, and would be more than willing to help if you just give a shout.