Don't over react. I guess he is either her group overseer or the secretary or both. It is quite normal for a "reports please" text to go to all group members that haven't reported promptly. The sec/gp overseer also would make sure that blood cards were up to date if a baby was due.
The only slightly out of ordinary one is the "miss you at the meeting" but a keen group overseer might do that if he thinks your wife is struggling spiritually.
I think he is just being what he thinks is a good elder.
I would talk to your wife if you feel unhappy, not the elder. I mean this isn't the stone age where men go "Me Tarzan! You - leave Jane alone!"