Where you are in your life now.....What would you have preferred .... To be left in ignorance ? ...Or to know the truth about the truth

by smiddy 30 Replies latest jw friends

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  smiddy

  I think possibly their are a few valid reasons for either options to this question ,depending on a number of factors .

  Such as how old you might be, how long you have devoted your life to the "Truth" as you believed it .?....How it may affect your mental/physical health and well being.?

  How it will affect your financial position in your life ,? are you dependent in some way with the J.W.`s /Organization /Family , either now or in the future,?

  And then of course family relationships and yourself , the pros and cons of knowing TTATT and whether it would have been better to remain ignorant and still be a Jehovah`s Witness in good standing , believing everything that came out of the F&DS class , or to know the TTATT and get on with the rest of your life regardless of how old or young you are.

  smiddy
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  jonahstourguide

  I love the question Smiddy.

  And i'm in Oz.

  And i cannot but attempt to address the 'dot points' Old enough to have been plucked out of education due to 1975. 23 years born in at that time and lasted till 34 yrs. At the risk of a psychological melt down i walked,,,,,, into the arms of the homosexual community that accepted me as a human being,,, that was an enlightenment. i am a hetro male of the species by the way. Given that i went on to enjoy life after the wt was brilliant. I moulded a life for me, i wallowed in the freedom that really exists apart from wt stalag 13. Ok, life as a single person can be lonely irrespective of any ecclesiastical views. but i moved forward and out of the restrictive mind controlling gb inspired fears, and i realised it was a dream never to come true. Now however (4 years ago) I've tried to have another shot at "making the truth my own" Ha Ha famous last words. Never good to be ignorant. I did the research after i was reinstated to get the bottom line. thats when the reality started to become evident. Goodness me !!!!! as it happens I dont have family relationships to deal with and I genuinely empathise with those that do. I have, however made some genuine friends during my 'return' and i worry for them given that I now know the 'bottom line' So for now i'm gonna play it cool and go with the flow and slowly help my friends to see the tatt. Tell Ya what Smiddy as you know ... stickin youre head in the sand does not work.

  jtg
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  Je.suis.oisif

  Smiddy - Great question.

  I'll be 60 next year. I've spent the past 30+ yrs. drinking the kool aide. I had few expectations, and boy I wasn't disappointed. Stopping smoking gave an obvious health benefit. Trade off was mental health issues due to the constant expectation of the big A, and living in a constant flux. This is now calming down. I'm glad I know TTATT.

  Good post. Thank you.
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  The Rebel

  Smiddy; " How it will effect your financial position in life"

  That is my main regret, I became to attached to money, and now I realise that attachment to money was as addictive as the watchtower. In the watchtower I never felt the need to live on money. Then when I left my life became only a matter of finance but " when I had no money, in the W.T there was no money" I was happy.

  Now I have money, invested in property and currency, but it hasn't made me happy. I guess I left the W.T and read too many book on the subject on making money? To much of the world is based on the perception of money. Today I see people with much happier families than I, and I know it's because they have less money than I.

  Why do I say this?

  I call it contentment, and being able to enjoy a simple and happy life. I wish I was able to simply sell my properties and live a contented happy life. But I can't so I spend spent my days on investments and currency exchange which therefore means where I am in life is no different than in the Watchtower.

  I am now trying to fit my life around what should be the key values in my life, as opposed to materialistic and religiouse crap. I have realised that true contentment and the love we have and give is given and received by being ourselfs.

  The Rebel.
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  jhine

  Smiddy , what a fantastic thread !

  I shall be reading the answers with great interest , and why didn't I think of it ? Good job some people on here have more than one brain cell . LOL

  Jan
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  stuckinarut2

  I guess that life was structured and didn't require any thinking or effort on my part as a born in witness.

  Yet, did I really develop into myself, or simply into a JW clone?

  Im much happier to have the ability to look from the outside of the fishbowl now and see things from ALL perspectives.
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  vinman

  I'm 45 and I was a lifer. While it felt tragic to wake up to TTATT less than a year ago, my body physically and mentally is at rest. I am a realist. If the organization is false, I want to know, no matter what the outcome is. It is WAY too much work to simply retain an artificial world. I feel fortunate that I have a decent job. I feel fortunate that I still maintain my lifestyle minus the Watchtower. The Watchtower said we would experience "the blackness of darkness". I realize that is only true if we make it happen. I try to look at my experience in a positive light. What would my life of been had I not been a witness? I look at my extended family, most likely, not a good one. Perhaps in jail. Maybe on drugs. Health issues due to smoking. I feel I did learn that life is important and not necessarily "stuff". I learned how to express myself in public. It was easier raising my children. Do I give Watchtower credit necessarily? Not really. Many Mormons come out feeling similarly. Same with Amish. It reminds me of all the crappy companies I worked for when I was an apprentice. Some taught me speed. Some taught me detail. Others taught me what work is. Even though I hated those companies, I would not be the skilled and wanted worker I am today had I not had that experience. One former elder put it nicely. He said "no one is in the right boat". We are all the same. We want to be happy. We all want to find a purpose in life, regardless of the path we take.
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  Phizzy

  I am now in a very good place. No way would I wish I had never learned TTATT.

  I am a lover of Truth, so to find out that what I had thought was at least generally "the truth" was nothing like, was a shock. To find out that people I had trusted, the leaders of the WT/JW religion, had deliberately lied to me and misled me was a shock.

  It was a little like finding out that your "parents" were not who they said they were, and had been untruthful for the whole of your life.

  It was hard to lose my JW family, not entirely as we are not DF or anything, but there is distance and coldness now, where once we were close.

  But since leaving I have become comfortable with who and what I am, and feel I am now the real me.

  I have only experienced real happiness and fulfillment since leaving.
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  pronomono

  Looking back, I definitely prefer knowing the truth about the truth instead of remaining ignorant.

  It was tough getting to this stage in life. I'm a 29 y.o. born-in, baptized at 16, awake for 2 years now. I took the initial awakening hard. I've always been a think-before-you-act and "Primum non nocere"-type person. So it was rough holding in all my new knowledge without being able to take action. I went through stage of anger and suicidal depression. I kept it all to myself, except for the bits and pieces I shared on here. I started loosing sleep, felt sick more often, shit blood, and was generally in a down-and-out mood. I couldn't concentrate at work and had no motivation.

  The only dependence I have on JWs is the emotional ties to my friends and family, and in particular one friend who's stuck it out with me till now. I think this will come to an end soon because I think that, although he truly loves me as a friend, he's hoping that providing me with good association, I'll come back. While I'm thinking just the opposite.

  Looking back on my journey to this point, I'm surprised how ignorant I was, but I wouldn't change the journey. It was necessary to experience it to begin getting my life back, the life I never had. And I've still got quite a journey to go. I'm now on an upward swing. I've opened up some about what's happening with me to my closest friends and my wife. My wife has stopped attending meetings, although she mentions going sometimes. Neither of us go in service. I'm happier. I don't suffer from as many bouts of depression. My health is much better. Work is better. I can't complain.

  I'm sure I'll have another setback once it comes out into the open for everyone that I'm no longer a JW and have no intentions of coming back, but I'll handle that when I get there.
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  eyeuse2badub

  Hey Smiddy,

  I'm 68 now and had been a dub since I was 4. Like most life long dubs I had no choice due to my mom's influence and the threat of being df'ed. For a long time I think I really and truly bought into the wtbts crap. I was a 'golden boy' for the wtbts. Baptized at 12, pioneer at 18, giving public talks throughout the circuit by 19, lots of circuit assembly parts, 2 year sentence for not going to Vietnam, elder at 23 when the 'elder program' started, and the list goes on. By the time I finally 'really' woke up and started doing the research that my logical, reasonable mind demanded, I was nearly 60. By that time I had been suffering tremendously from cognitive dissonance an needed several weeks in a mental health facility to help me realize why I was so depressed and ready to end it all.

  Needless to say I survived and today I'm a truly happy person. No more fear of the borg, no more toiling endlessly for the borg. My wife isn't especially happy about my 'awakening' but she certainly sees a better me. My children see me differently but I know that they like the "real" me. I now actually have genuine time for my family to enjoy life. The TRUTH (aka ttatt) really does set you free.

  just saying!

  eyeuse2badub