>How To Shower Like A Woman
>1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to
>lights and darks.
>2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along
>the
>way, cover up any exposed areas.
>3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do
>more
>sit-ups
>4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah,
>wide loofah, and pumice stone.
>5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
>vitamins.
>6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.!
>7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with
>natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15 minutes.
>8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until
>red.
>9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and Jaffa cake body wash.
>10. Complain because your husband has been eating your ginger nut and Jaffa
>cake body wash.
>11. Rinse conditioner off hair.
>12. Shave armpits and legs.
>13. Turn off shower.
>14. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex.
>15. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap
>hair in super absorbent towel.
>16. Check entire body for zits, tweeze unwanted hairs.
>17. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
>18. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>
How To Shower Like a Man
>1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in
>a
>pile.
>2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake wiener
>at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.
>3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your
>wiener and scratch your
behind.
>4. Get in the shower.
>5. Wash your face.
>6. Wash your armpits.
>7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
>8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud they sound
>in
>the shower.
>9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
>10. Wash your behind, leaving those coarse hairs stuck on the soap.
>11. Shampoo your hair.
>12. Taste your wife's ginger nut and Jaffa cake body wash.
>13. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
>14. Pee.
>15. Rinse off and get out of shower.
>16. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was
>hanging out of tub the whole time.
>17. Admire wiener size in mirror again.
>18. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
>19. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass wife, pull
>off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound again.
>20. Throw wet towel on bed.
>
>