It takes a good imagination to be a JDub

by Sour Grapes 12 Replies latest jw experiences

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  Sour Grapes

  At the Regional convention, the speaker said that Jehovah is our best friend. So let's see...if I need a ride to the doctor's office can I call on my best friend to give me a ride to the office? When I wake up in the morning and tell my best friend Jehovah, "Good morning, how are you?", he never answers my question.

  If I want to share a meal with my best friend what will Jehovah eat? When I tell my best friend a joke will I hear him laugh? When my mom died and I told my best friend, God did not tell me how sorry he was and he did come to the funeral, nor did he even send me a sympathy card.

  I guess that I just expect a little more from a best friend. Another speaker said that we can also make Jehovah happy or sad. I wonder which member of the Gibbering Booty Jehovah shared that with so that we know we are so important in the universe that we affect the emotions of God?
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  Wake Me Up Before You Jo-Ho

  Three kinds of people with imaginary friends:

  1) Children

  2) Schizophrenics

  3) Jehovah's Witnesses
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  Sour Grapes

  Wake Me Up...well said. How can someone love something that we can not see, hear, touch, or even know if they exist?
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  snugglebunny

  When I wake up in the morning and tell my best friend Jehovah, "Good morning, how are you?", he never answers my question.

  Wooo...you've never read your Watchtower on the subject! tut tut... BTW, no telling jokes in your prayers either.

  WT 15 March, 86:

  When individuals have the opportunity to speak to kings or rulers of this world, they usually do so respectfully and with dignity, highly appreciating the privilege. Should we be less respectful and appreciative when speaking to "the living God and the King to time indefinite"? (Jeremiah 10:10) Of course not. Thus, such expressions as, "Good afternoon, Jehovah" or, "We want to talk to you, Jehovah" are out of place in prayer, as are conversational remarks such as, "How are you today?" "Give our love to Jesus," or, "Have a nice day."—Compare Ecclesiastes 5:1, 2.

  But then, the WT of June 1, 85 had previously stated:

  Questions

  From Readers

  ·Are there things that we should avoid saying when we pray to Jehovah?

  Yes, there are. We should avoid saying things in our prayers that sound overly familiar and suggest to others (in public prayers) that we are being disrespectful. Such expressions as "Good afternoon, Jehovah" and "Give our love to Jesus" are not fitting, nor are humorous comments or even jokes in our prayers.
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  punkofnice

  grapey - If I want to share a meal with my best friend what will Jehovah eat?

  I never go out, buy all my ingredients, cook the meal then call my best friend to say thanks.

  
  
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  pale.emperor

  I remember when i first woke up and my brain would automatically start a prayer before i ate. I managed to stop it by looking up to the sky and saying "thanks Thor!" instead. The absurdity of it all told my brain that praying was silly.
  
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  days of future passed

  Yes a best friend that will kill you if you make a mistake. That won't do a single thing for any human because the time isn't just right.
  
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  JW_Rogue

  Another speaker said that we can also make Jehovah happy or sad. I wonder which member of the Gibbering Booty Jehovah shared that with so that we know we are so important in the universe that we affect the emotions of God?

  This has never made sense, there are 8 billion people on earth so God must be very emotionally confused. Maybe each one of us makes his heart sad or glad for tiny fraction of a second?

  
  
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  Beth Sarim

  I have always wondered that sentiment myself.
  
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  Finkelstein

  Jehovah is our best friend

  He will especially show his friendship when he kills all but your fellow Jws members at the soon to come Armageddon and get you a place in a earthly paradise for a 1000 years.