Tattoo a swastika on your forehead and demand an open casket.
(Post has been corrected!) Suppose you don't WANT a JW funeral?!?
by razorMind 16 Replies latest jw friends
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NeonMadman
When my father died, I allowed my step-siblings (who were actually closer to my natural father than I was due to my years as a JW) to handle the arrangements. My father was not especially religious, and in particular, didn't care much for JW's. His step-family (acquired when I was 17) was Catholic, but he had been raised in a Protestant setting, though not a very religious one. The steps arranged for a Protestant minister to come in and do the funeral.
My JW (now ex-)wife and I were separated, and smack in the middle of our divorce at the time. She came to the funeral, and made a big scene arguing with me. She was livid that, as the only natural offspring of the deceased, I had not taken command of the arrangements, and brought in a JW elder to do the funeral. I explained that my father would not have wanted that; she didn't care. Understand, by this time I was totally inactive and wanted nothing to do with the organization anyway.
Finally, I told her that if anything happened to her, I'd arrange for a Baptist minister to come in and do the service.
She got a horrified look on her face, and said "Why, are you a Baptist now?"
I said, "No, but since it doesn't matter what the wishes of the deceased are, why should you get the type of funeral that you would want?"
Then she huffed a bit and stomped out of the funeral home. I was very grateful that she hadn't ridden up there with me (about an hour from home) as originally planned, but had taken her own car.
JW's couldn't care less about the wishes of the deceased; all they want is an opportunity for another Watchtower infomercial. So, I'd suggest you make very specific arrangements in advance, if you don't want a JW funeral.
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TresHappy
It seems that JW's will stomp and pitch fits until they get their way. My grandmother wasn't a JW and when she died last year, my father was absolutely determined to give her a JW funeral. It didn't matter what we felt, he was her POA and even prevented the use of blood transfusions during her final illness. JW's don't care about anyone but themselves and protecting their turf and making sure they shove their beliefs down everyone's throat until they get their way..Consider cruzanheart's recent tragedy...people showing up with brochures to hand out at her father's memorial service...the gall of these people just never stops does it...
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Fe2O3Girl
Max Divergent said:
I've always wondered what happens and who conducts a totally non-religious funeral?
In the UK, the British humanist organisation have officiants who will conduct non-religious weddings, baby namings, and funerals.
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DJ
The whole funeral thing has been weighing heavily on my mind lately. Just yesterday I went to my Aunt's funeral. She was the person who brought the jw's to my family back in the 70's. She was never baptized and in the past few years my mother had been conducting weekly studies with her. I had several conversations with my Aunt. She didn't buy all of the jw teachings but she was confused. Anyway, yesterday was her funeral....her husband is Catholic and he had his priest give a very brief talk at the funeral home. As I was leaving I noticed a large table set up with blue brochures that said something like, "What is hope". I reached to pick one up and my husband said....."Don't" I asked why and he told me that he picked one up and it was a jw brochure. I was wondering who had the nerve to 'count time' at my Aunt's funeral. I felt sick.
My dad is a jw and he is very sick. I have been having thoughts about the funeral and I have to say that I don't know what to do. I am totally opposed to their teachings and I do not want to set foot into a KH ever. I am a Christian now. (oh be quiet....lol) I just hate the way that they portray Christ as just a name to stick at the end of a prayer. I hate the hypocrisy and the lies. I hate the arrogance and the never ending self righteousness. I love my dad dearly and will be in great sorrow when he dies. I am not sure what is right to do. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings by not going to the hall but I am torn. I honestly don't know if I could handle a jw funeral. I have never been to one and I'm not so sure that emotionally I will be able to handle it while in such pain over the loss of my dad. I try to tell myself to go for my dad's sake but that makes no sense. To me, funerals are for the living.....to help them to say goodbye and share their grief w/ others who care. I would never want to disrespect my pop but I don't want to listen to jw's disregard my Savior either. This stinks. I feel that if I didn't go my mom and siblings would never speak to me again. I am at a loss here. Any suggestions considering my beliefs?
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bittersweet
It's so funny that this topic has been brought up.It is actually something I've worried about too.Not that I need to worry,I'm only 33,but one never can predict the future.My husband is still an active witness,and I'm afraid he'd want a memorial at the hall.Most of my family is active too,so I'm sure they would push this.I gess I should look into drafting a will.Maybe I will have a worldly friend as executer to make sure my wishes are fulfilled.Now wouldn't that put my family in an uproar!
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Valis
I think personally I would make it very hard for them to do so...I have one such friend who has JW family and they would most assuredly have it the way they wanted...the only thing is that I am the sole executor of his death policy...so much for them doing that! He wants a party and a cremation and not any religious business. He refuses any other option if that ugly day ever comes.. I and 3 other friends also get the pleasure of travelling where he wants to distribute the ashes...Kind of nice huh? Whatever they have to do after that to get on and grieve I think is fine, just not a part of what the deceased wanted most. Early expressions of intent go a long way in saving you from being some plasma floating around the Kingdom Hall listening to how yer gonna get ressurected...*LOLOLOLOL* Eheheheh...J/K its ether not plasma...
Sincerely,
District Overbeer "Tired Of Funerals For A Long While" class