JW Hypocracy at it's Finest (page 2)

teenyuck

I must add:

As to her swearing: I learned every word I know from her. She curses with the best of them. Especially when she is pointing out the failings of *worldies*.

On whether or not she committed fraud; I think she did. Last time she went to this ER, she gave them a phoney address, in Cook County, Illinois, so they would treat her. I suspect she did the same thing.

I am going to have to look up some info on the county and the hospital and see what I find. If I do find something that states the hospital is for *County* residents, I will e-mail her the link and call her to discuss it.

rocketman

While I think it's true that not all jws are like that, there is sometimes a tendency that I have noticed on the part of some to take unfair and illegal advantage of government services. Several in my area have tried claiming disability when in fact they go door-door, which obviously takes physical exertion and is work in and of itself in every sense of the word physically.

Also, teenyuck mentioned that other jws have knowledge of her mom's dealings and actually facilitate her cheating. Not good.

NeonMadman

The hypocritical part: She is a flag waving JW. She lies, cheats and steals at will. She thinks Jehovah will overlook her horrid ways and let her into the new system....all because she goes door to door and is so pious.

Sounds like a LOT of JW's I have known. Their personal conduct isn't important; only keeping up appearances for the congregation. So what if they're dishonest and immoral - they're regular in field service! God HAS to approve of them!

(I'll bet she doesn't use the f*** word at the Kingdom Hall! )

Gamaliel

teenyuck,

Your mother has a pretty disgusting attitude about people. But I wouldn't "expose" her just to hurt her. That wouldn't be much different than what's happening to pr_capone (Eric) even though you'd be in the right, in this case.

She obviously is pretty good at living the double-life necessary to show love in front of the brothers but a true hatred of other people. When my conversations started up again with my JW family, I wanted to catch up on how people were doing that I hadn't heard about in 15 years. My mother had been a pioneer who spent 90 hours in service per month, (40 of it drinking coffee) and at least another 90 hours of it in gossip per month. There was a time when she couldn't help herself from telling me about so-and-so's demise. It was supposed to an "oblique" lesson to me to get back to the JWs. But if I'd learn about pioneers on welfare, elder so-and-so defrauding their aging parents out of their money, or some elder's kids getting away with drug use for years, I was always anxious to give a "witness" about Witnesses. My first instinct would be to say something subtle, along with a gossipy memory that she would appreciate, like, "Well if you think about it, most JWs were hypocrites: remember Bro. Masterson, how every time he'd open a new gas station, all the JWs would try to get free gas, or they'd promise to pay and run up a bill so big he'd finally have to shut down."

My goal was not to get my parents out of the JW religion, but to let them know that their Watchtower praise was meaningless to me. Now, of course, everyone I ask about is either doing "fine" or they "died some time ago." LOL!

The Bible says "all Cretans are liars," JWs must think there is another scripture that says "When in Crete, do as the Cretans do."

Gamaliel

teenyuck

Gamaliel, that is sooo true.

She likes to call to tell me about who is ill, who got DFd, who got divorced, etc. It seems to give her pleasure in their pain. I have started pointing out the negatives from the past, just as you did. It works. Shuts her down immediately.

You are also correct about *outing* her. While it would hurt her, she would deny, deny, deny. Then she would demand an apology from me. Which I would never give.

It is not worth the mental and emotional pain. She has a *persecution* complex that is common among them. Something negative happens, it is Satan and he is targeting JWs.

Since she is putting on such a good front to the JWs, I won't bother saying anything.

I would demand that she be given a blood transfusion if I had a chance. I know she would be furious, however, in the end, with her skewed logic and outlook, she would forgive....she would blame me and think that Jehovah would forgive her.

I am so glad some of you have seen this side of the borg. I keep thinking I must be the only one with such a nut for a mom.

obiwan

Weeelllll....The less you know and the less you get involved the less stressed out and angry beyond belief you will be.

There's an old saying....What comes around, goes around. I know it may not seem like it know but she will get hers, maybe not this month or the the next but it will happen.

This should also give you a hint of how far your trust with her should go.

Francois

Suggest you remember Mt. 7:1, and then forget all about your mother's behavior. Really. Judging your mother is the province of a higher power. All you need to do is not practice that stuff yourself. All will be fine.

francois

Alana

Looking at this at merely a secular level, and not religiously at all, what your mother did is very irritating....not to mention illegal. I have over 20 years in the healthcare field (in the management part, not in direct patient care) and it is things like this--repeated by people all over, that helps to contribute to the rise in medical care costs. Using false names or addresses to obtain 'free' medical care is FRAUD...it is lying, cheating, and stealing.....it can be punishable by law. Now, factor in the religious aspect, and how can she truly rationalize that it's alright as a JW to lie, cheat, or steal?? Aren't JW's obligated to follow 'Caesar's laws'? As you can tell, this is a topic that can really get my goat. :-) Does she use a false social security number, too? There are ways to track people down and, if found, they can find out if a person has the means to pay and could pursue collection and/or legal action. But, it doesn't sound like she is open to much reason. Personally, I feel that people who try to cheat the medical system need to be turned in.... if not, all it just hurts the others who are honestly working to pay their bills, because it causes the fees to increase, etc....I just don't know if you want to be the one to do that or not....it doen't mean she'll stop, she just may go somewhere else in the future and not tell you....unless it is done anonymously. Just my 2 cents.........

azaria

Hi Teenyuck!

I can really relate to your story. Just before coming to this site today I was thinking about my own mother. I went to visit my parents last Friday and it may the last for a little while. I have made a promise to myself that I would try to keep a relationship with my parents but I am finding it so tough. I really don’t like my parents but I do believe that God wants us to love our parents no matter what. I think in part to show them how a true Christian behaves. There is no true love that I feel from my parents. At times it really hurts (my father has never told me that he cares about me) I think they are truly self-centred. They have a strained relationship with all four of their children. They believe that most people are stupid and ignorant (if only they knew how stupid and ignorant they come across). But there is nothing I can do for them except to try to be kind. My one brother and I are in awe, how did we come from these people? (they seem so foreign to us). I know it’s hard but I really believe that you have to let go of the anger that you have towards your mother. I still struggle with it (I pray a lot) The anger doesn’t make us any better than them and I want to be above that. I want to be a loving person. That is what God wants from us; to love Him with all our heart, and to love others as we love ourselves. All the doctrine is just a guideline (so many people believe that if they just follow all the rules, they’ll be okay-it sure is a lot easier than to love others) No-one said it was easy. It is easy to love somebody that is loveable but very difficult when someone is irrated, critical and feeling morally superior to everyone else. In the end it only hurts yourself. Do you think your mother is fretting and loosing sleep worrying about how you are feeling. If your mother is anything like mine, she only feels for herself (the victim) Please don’t reduce yourself to the way your mother is. I say that I am so unlike my mother (I also do look like her) then I need to prove it to myself by being forgiving and more caring unlike her.

Take care, take a deep breath and (I just did) I think I needed to see your post today as much as you needed to vent.

teenyuck

{{{Azaria}}}

Thank you...you are right. I am trying. I figured my mom was an anomaly...until I came here and saw that many people have similar circumstances.

I cannot prove anything against her. She is a selfish manipulator, so I don't know what name or SS # she gave at the hospital. I just know that she is quite proud of herself when she does stuff like this.

I have been disapproving in the past so she does not open up as much. It is just so hard to really dislike your parent. Whatever good points she has as far out-weighed by the negatives. I think I need to talk to a therapist....

It really is helpful to type it, read it, go back and re-read it and realize that I can only limit my contact. Which I have done.

Thank you all for your comments and advice.

Tina

JW Hypocracy at it's Finest

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