After 10 years do they give up on you (hoping so) (page 2)

notsurewheretogo

I've been out 5 years and haven't had a visit in 3 years.

ctrwtf

They've been coming to my door once or twice a year, always unannounced, always rebuffed.

I've not been to a meeting in what will be ten years this fall. They came by again not long ago prompting me to ask the PO to put me on the do not call list. So far no visits. Keeping my fingers crossed.

Phizzy

I too have wondered about this, we have been out for a decade, and even the occasional call by an Elder seems to have stopped, good !

The problem as I see it is that we are caught by the usual JW trick of acting whatever way suits them. They claim one minute that you are not a JW if you do not preach/attend meetings, but if they have something on you they will set up a JC before you can say Kangaroo Court.

I would like to see them try to DF me, boy would I have some fun ! The National Media would be invited to monitor all proceedings, to record, and then broadcast.

DesirousOfChange

No specific rule on that. Years ago, they would destroy Pub Cards after 8 years inactive. No more. They want you in the file just in case they need to "go after you" with a JC to silence you.

Usually if you're under the radar long enough, they will forget about you long before 10 years passes. You may be dealing with the fact that when the CO comes along, he'll ask if they've called on inactive ones. It might help if you relocate and they don't find your new address.

Relatives pushing them to "help" you is always trouble.

stan livedeath

after i was declared to be apostate in 1981--ive never had an elder visit me--but then i have moved around a lot !

about 4 years back--i had my old dad ( a dub for 50 years) come to live with me--following a fall. one of his friends--an elder--came to visit him. i left them to it. as the elder was about to leave--he said to me--" so when are you coming back into the truth " ?

ha ha. i smiled--and suggested we discuss it sometime. ive never seen him since.

steve2

If you have no family or extended family ties to the organization it is less bothersome fading. Relocating elsewhere can also be helpful.

Conversely, having still- in family and remaining in the same locality make it harder to fade and to be left alone.

redpilltwice

I would like to see them try to DF me, boy would I have some fun ! The National Media would be invited to monitor all proceedings, to record, and then broadcast.

Yes Phizzy, that's the way to give them no power and to even turn the tables.

In case they still want to DF me (after all, we celebrated X-mas and birthdays and I practice mild activism) I could always remind them that I can easily share some spicy stories with the media.

ToesUp

"I appreciate your concern, but there's nothing private & personal I wish to discuss with anyone at the moment. Thanks anyway."

We have stuck with this line and it works. It can be hard not to let everything you feel come out of your mouth like a waterfall. By making a statement like this, you do not feed the JW gossiper or the Elder that is trying to hang you from the highest tree. Not giving a JW info they so desperately want is like letting the air out of a balloon. If you are dealing with a bully Elder, it can actually be fun watching the air being let out of his balloon. They want the info so bad but you are taking control and not allowing it. So fun!!!

Spiral

Hi All,

Thank you for all the responses. I'm not too worried about the few here that still know me from years ago, they don't seem to care one way or the other. They don't come check on my Mom either. That's sad but she doesn't seem to notice. They have their own problems that keep them busy.

Mr. Spiral and I have moved around a lot, so the record of our existence in the bOrg might be gone. Funny thing is, you would think the super spiritual relatives would want to help us see the error of our ways, but they do not. One in particular was the aggressive by-the-book type, so I thought that he might try to get local brothers to come and "help" (read: bother) me. I am surprised, but not unhappy. But given how he used to be (as mentioned above, the bully type) I thought there might be some sort of rule in the secret elder book that comes into play.

RolRod

I walked away around 1992, moved around and then left the state. They tried to meet with me, but I just blew them off.

After 10 years do they give up on you (hoping so)

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