My 12 year old's spiritual quest..I could use some advice

by Eyebrow2 14 Replies latest jw friends

  • Eyebrow2
    Eyebrow2

    For the last few years, my son has been thinking about what happens when you die. It has caused many a nights lost sleep for him. Today he asked me (for the upteenth time) what I thought happens when you die. I told him that when I was a witness, I was taught that the soul and body was one, so that when the body died so did the soul. But, since 144,000 could gain entrance into heaven, to me that was contridictory. And, if people are to be resurrected, yet their bodies had rotted after death, shouldn't the soul be gone? The explanation that god remembers the person and "recreates him" never settled well with me. Holy Cloning, Batman! A clone is not the same person as the original. I told him that I believe (and hope) that there is something for us after death, but am not sure what. I did tell him that I do not believe in Hell, because I find it unnatural...and total nonsense.

    He proceeded to tell me that he did believe in heck (he wont say hell, it is very cute, haha!), but not to the same degree that many religions do. He felt it was a place that very bad people went, not to be tortured, but to be punished for a while until they are better, and then they move on to somewhere else or maybe become a better person. I told him that this sound a lot like reincarnation..which led to a discuss on past lives..etc. He then told me that he does not believe in one god. He turned to me and said (we were in the car) "I am a Polytheist" he believes that one god could not handle all of mankind and nature. I said, sure greek and roman gods had human imperfections, so they could not. But that most monotheistic religions believed in a Supreme being, so that god would not have imperfections, so they could handle it. But I did not tell him he was wrong...because who knows?

    (and for those of you wondering...yes he has studied some Greek and Roman history/mythology...I think that influence is showing a wee bit)

    I am very glad that he is starting to think through his fears, and although I may not agree with his conclusions, was impressed that he has never stopped having a spiritual thirst. I would like to get him some books to read that gives a good overview of variuos religions. He already knows what a lot of the JWs are about, and my mother is a die hard....I am thinking outside of the JudeoChristian religions. I loved reading Mankinds Search for God...it just made me more interested in other religions, and I think after reading that book I first starting having serious doubts about the JWs. Can anyone give me some advice on how to encourage him looking for his own answers?

  • DJ
    DJ

    Hi eyebrow,

    Forgive me, I am very tired and need to get some sleep but I just wanted to give you a scripture to read. It's Matt. 10:28. You're question about the body in the grave while the soul isn't.... is shown there by the Master himself. Goodnight and welcome to the board. dj

  • asleif_dufansdottir
    asleif_dufansdottir

    He then told me that he does not believe in one god. He turned to me and said (we were in the car) "I am a Polytheist" he believes that one god could not handle all of mankind and nature. I said, sure greek and roman gods had human imperfections, so they could not. But that most monotheistic religions believed in a Supreme being, so that god would not have imperfections, so they could handle it. But I did not tell him he was wrong...because who knows?

    Excellent point, mom We don't know. Even if we choose to believe a (any) religious text, we are still just taking someone's word for it.

    As the resident "pagan with agnostic leanings" (or is it "agnostic with pagan leanings"??), can I give you a huge complement for not freaking out on him when he told you this? It is a huge and dangerous step to tell your parents your religious beliefs are a little different. (I'm sure this totally shocks this board ). He must know he can trust you not to go fundamentalist on him. Kudos.

  • peacefulpete
    peacefulpete

    a.d. The natural curiosity and teachability of your son is a quality of youth lost all too soon. What our youth need is to be taught critical thinking skills that will protect them from spritual abuse and aimless speculation. Don't squander it with tossing bones that teach him nothing other than that most people are as confused as he is. His choices in life should be made that satisfy both the intellect and the heart. Please consider books that study the topics of superstion and pseuoscience in general, this provides an overview of opinions and insight into human nature that is greater than that which he will recognise thru exposure to a few popular theories. Some excellent suggestions written for young people are:Maybe Yes Maybe No, by Dan Barker; The Magic Detective by Joe Nickel; Sasquatches from Outspace by Tim Yule. These three books encourage youth to think for themselves before adopting popular theories and rumors. They are fun and cheerfully written yet informative. They bear directly upon how we satisfy our spiritual life. We owe our children the best chance at success, and success results from being well informed and confident adults.

  • Francois
    Francois

    Suggest you get him a copy of Houston Smith's "The Religions of Man." Best book I ever read concerning all the major religions of earth, and the information is presented in an even-handed, non-discriminatory manner. While you're at it, I think it would also be helpful to get him a copy of Eric Hoffer's "The True Believer," which deals with mass movements of all kinds: religious, political, social and which will help guard him from cultic attachments.

    Your son wants definite answers from an unimpeachable source, that is the very formula that gets people involved in cults. He needs your thoughtful assistance, and I believe these two books will help very much.

    francois

  • asleif_dufansdottir
    asleif_dufansdottir

    I must admit I haven't read them yet, but I plan to read Joseph Campbell's studies of the commonalities of the myths of all cultures (including Bible stories) and what those commonalities may tell us about humanity's need for religion, as well as tales that most if not all religions share.

    If your son's reading level is up to it, he might find them really interesting. There is also a DVD/VHS of what I think was a PBS series on Campbell by Bill Moyers, called "Joseph Campbell and the Power of Myth." And another DVD/VHS called "Joseph Campbell - Mythos".

  • zucker
    zucker

    Sounds like a pretty bright kid.

  • anti-absolutist
    anti-absolutist

    eyebrow2,

    I agree with zucker, that your son sounds pretty bright. I also think that you did a pretty good job of allowing him to keep an open mind. An open mind is a necessity to live a COMPLETE life.

    I just started reading "The Celestine Prophecy", by James Redfield. I'm only in the third chapter, but it talks about how mankind has evolved in their spirituality over the milleniums past. It makes some very interesting comments. It certainly makes me realize, anyway, how the most pious and religious people seem to miss out on the amazing things going on in the universe and how energy is all tied together.

    Brad

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    How about some light reading - The Lion the Witch, and the Wardrobe - Narnia series? It does come from a christian perspective, but it is chock full of mythological figures and is full of allegory. He might like it. ...or is that too young for this twelve year old? I am so out of touch...

  • LDH
    LDH

    I usually tell my 13 year old---no matter what she wants to believe, it should not be set in stone at the age of 13!

    I tell her what I DID believe, what I DO believe and what I THINK I will believe. But also I tell her that what she believes should be a life-long quest.

    Not given to her as in a stupid ass "My CROOK of Bible Stories"

    Lisa

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