I appreciate your input Kaleb, thank you. Maybe I didn't express myself clearly enough but I'm really not angry at god, how could I be if I don't believe he exists. My frustration is layered. I guess I'm annoyed with myself because for a large part of my life I did believe and have what I thought was a close relationship with him. Then to realise what an arsehole he really was, well it leaves a mark.
More than that though, I'm frustrated at those who put the blinkers on and point blank refuse to acknowledge the plain facts. Is it a fact that god at one time murdered every child in existence? No of course not, don't waste time having that argument with me. It IS a fact however that this global infanticide by god is recorded in the Bible and yet that counts for almost nothing in the minds of the faithful who wouldn't even call themselves Christian if it weren't for that same book.
Dismiss it as allegory if you like but it's still sitting there like the abusive Uncle everyone wants to avoid and hide from view.