New standard on how they treat disfellowship

by Butterflyleia85 42 Replies latest members private

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  slimboyfat

  My grandma invited me to the memorial and asked if she could send articles. This is after she asked how I was doing in college. I said I don't think you realize how traumatic the disfellowshipment was. I invite you to do some research in psychology and the study of how one is isolated from their family and friends. She said well I'm talking to you now.

  This is interesting on lots of levels. It seems your grandma understood the new instruction as a green light to make contact again. I guess there are probably many people in the same position and hearing from JW relatives for the first time in a long time. On the positive side it means that your grandma really did want to get in contact with you again and took the first opportunity that came. Not everyone will be in that position. I’m sure some JWs will carry on complete shunning for a variety of reasons: the new policy is ambiguous, they’re not that eager to make contact again, they’re embarrassed it would be perceived as a climbdown.

  The other thing is that your grandma just assumes that she can reestablish the contact without saying sorry for shunning you. Even now JWs still seem to think things like (I’m not saying in your case but in general) that it’s the disfellowshipped person’s fault that contact ended, and that the person should be grateful when contact is reestablished.

  There does not seem to be any room for the idea that they did wrong by shunning, even in the face of a policy change. Surely it must occur to some JWs that if they make contact again now then that kind of implies they were wrong to completely shun the person in the first place.
  
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  joey jojo

  To me it seems the new arrangement has turned disfellowshipping into a revolving door policy, as opposed what it has always been, that is, a potential social death sentence.

  The GB want to avoid unnecessarily creating new apostates by welcoming people back much faster and not giving them a chance to form a grudge, get online and really lift the curtain.

  On the surface,it looks like softening, and it is to some extent, however the GB is still in complete control of people's lives.

  The only chink in the armour is, are the changes enough to open the flood gates to the point that families will go further with their relationships with previously shunned relatives than a simple, 'hi, how's it going?'

  That might be enough to start a tidal wave of emotions and make some families or friends say screw it, I'm taking this person back into my life anyway.
• 

  Listener

  Cofty, are you a known apostate? The Elders are not allowed to say why someone got dfd. Most JWs are not likely to know if a person is apostate or not unless the dfd person had been talking anti JW things to them. At least in theory. And if they have been gossiping, it's only hearsay and judgemental, neither is very Christian like.
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  Vidiot

  joey jojo - “…The GB want to avoid unnecessarily creating new apostates by welcoming people back much faster and not giving them a chance to form a grudge, get online and really lift the curtain…”

  Bullseye.
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  Beth Sarim

  Joey jojo.

  Good observation

  
  
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  cofty

  Cofty, are you a known apostate?

  And proud of it. I think years of tormenting them at their trolleys probably gave the game away. Having a letter published in the local paper opposing their planning application probably didn't help either.
  
  
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  Diogenesister

  Cofty, are you a known apostate?

  With bells and whistles!!😂
  
  
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  GrreatTeacher

  What amazing fuel for the JW rumor mill!

  While years ago, there WAS an announcement for the reason of disfellowshipping, this was discontinued in the face of slander lawsuits, I believe.

  So, how will people know whether or not they can greet a disfellowshipped person since no one other than the elders officially knows the reason?

  There will have to be gossip!

  Really, we all know that this is already the case. The gossip mill fills in the blanks after, "Brother Soandso is no longer a Jehovah's Witness," is read aloud.

  They just gave tacit approval of it.
• 

  NotFormer

  "My grandma invited me to the memorial and asked if she could send articles. This is after she asked how I was doing in college.

  "I said I don't think you realize how traumatic the disfellowshipment was. I invite you to do some research in psychology and the study of how one is isolated from their family and friends.

  "She said well I'm talking to you now." 🙄

  Channeling Little Red Riding Hood: Why Grandma, what big chutzpah you have!

  "I'm talking to you now". Really? Is the OP supposed to be grateful, not that Grandma changed her mind, but someone else changed it for her??
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  Jeffro

  The changed rules have been vaguely presented, but they do not specify that ‘conversations’ are now permitted, even at meetings, beyond inviting to meetings or greetings at meetings.
  

  Anticipating a Watchtower study article later in the year outlining that conversations beyond inviting to a meeting or brief greetings at the meeting are still off limits, and that members still should not look for excuses to talk to disfellowshipped individuals.