Lurker no more...

by breal 23 Replies latest jw experiences

  • breal
    breal

    I finally got the courage to post on another thread - so figured I would introduce myself. As I mentioned in other thread I have been df'd for about 9-10 yrs. I was raised in the "truth" - although neither of my parents were never really stellar examples of good JW's. Starting having troubles while still in high school. Doubted some things (although I am by no means as well versed in the bible doctrines as some here) and simply started to feel never quite good enough. Attempted suicide at a young age and this was really the catalyst for me to see that something in my life was majorly wrong. So I went about trying to find happiness...

    First I request help from my bookstudy conductor to find someone to study with me and attend meetings/service with as I knew according to the JW's I was "spiritually weak" - no response....fast forward about a year and I was requested to meet with the elders... this was all new to me as I had never had any run in's with anyone and so I went like a good little JW - as I posted in the other thread it did not go well - they read me a scripture about repenting...then asked for dirt on other youth in the hall... and when I refused to give them info about others or myself they read me a scripture about being evil and told me that none of my family or friends would be able to speak with me anymore.

    I left home - stayed with friends until I got my own place - ended up married at after a while to a very abusive person (I was looking to belong) and got divorced within the year. Had my wild time, my sad and angry time...but I was fortunate as being so young I discovered that my "worldly" friends were my new family. Thanks to some very lovely, supportive and caring people today I am the happiest I have ever been - married to my partner of 6 or 7 years.

    When I left I did not have access to internet and other than a few well intentioned people worried I needed deprogramming (which mostly meant converting to another faith)...I basically discovered all the joys and sorrows associated with having chosen a lifestyle contrary to everyone around me. I did not have any other ex JW's to speak with and until a sibling recently was df'd and mentioned finding a website a place of healing and closure I had no idea there was such forums as these.

    I probably won't post much but I like to read everyone's diverse opinions on so many topics and as everyone seems to say it is very comforting in a strange way to see some of my own emotions brought to the front by others.

  • Pleasuredome
    Pleasuredome

    welcome breal!!

    thanks for you intro... hope you enjoy posting.

  • Big Tex
    Big Tex

    I'm glad you made it out and I'm even more pleased that you have found happiness.

    Howdy and welcome!!

  • nowisee
    nowisee

    welcome breal.

    join the family.

    best wishes, nowisee

  • Warrigal
    Warrigal

    Greetings and welcome, Breal. Many of us can empathize with what you've been through. I hope you will continue to participate as all opinions and viewpoints are valued.

  • Gopher
    Gopher

    Breal,

    Welcome to the forum, and glad you have found some comfort from it. And congratulations on finding your way out of that high-control religion and into a happy relationship and truly meaningful life (and not one where you devote yourself to a selfish publishing society).

    So you got the boot after refusing to the blow the whistle on fellow young JW's? Sounds quite typical.

    The elders called you "evil"? They did that to me, after I wouldn't admit to stuff that never happened! Our experiences show the cruelty of the "committee judgment" system of the JW's -- once you don't kiss the elders' arse, they have nothing but trouble waiting for you!

    How good to be free of all that.

  • jst2laws
    jst2laws

    Hello Breal

    I love to hear of people finding 'support' and friends who express their own feelings. We have all been through the same thing, some of us inflicted much pain on others by our part in it, but we are in the same boat now.

    Having the experience in common does seem to give validation to the feelings we have.

    Hope you stay around and share yours.

    Jst2laws

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic

    Breal glad you are here! This is a great place, pull up a chair and let the healing begin......

    Katie

  • blondie
    blondie

    hi breal, please do post. I found that what I read from others inspired and inspires me to post. Welcome to the board.

    Blondie

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    I get it! Be_Real! Great name, and welcome! Yes, some of us like a little positive feedback to keep the old creative juices flowing. Your story sounds familiar somehow. You must have developed some amazing strengths, going through what you did.

    Very sad that even a "good kid" was put through the wringer.

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